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The Old Tower - N4A Chat Thread, January 2018


Chrom

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12 hours ago, Ephraim said:

Yeah, seems like tropical fish might be the way to go? Gives you a new weakness to blood moon though :P

Haha very true. I'm not sure if I'm ready to take damage from my lands yet :P All in all I'm staying with Mono-U until I can find Caverns for cheapish because damn I do not have another ~250 to drop on lands for Tropical fish haha.

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SURLY: When you're an animal,
life's a balancing act.
Each day is a quest to
find food to survive.
It's a tough nut to crack.
Wait, you think I'm one
of these dopey pigeons?
No, no, no, no, this is me.
The handsome one.
(COOING)
I got no problem with
my feathered friends.
In fact, I get a real
kick outta them.
(SQUAWKS)
They're really soft on the feet.
And they're always building
these little picnic baskets
that offer the occasional treat.
Apparently, not today.
Thanks for nothing.
(COOING)
At the end of the day, I'm
just like all you fine people.
I'm no hero.
I'm just a squirrel
trying to get a nut.
One bag of nuts, please.
And that's my buddy named,
well, Buddy.
He don't talk much.
Yeah, they say the world's
there for the taking.
So, that's just
what we're gonna do.
(CHILDREN LAUGHING)
RACCOON: Come along. Please keep
that food coming, everyone.
That's it. All finds are valuable.
(MOLE GRUNTING)
Mole, what is our food level now?
MOLE: Pickings are slim this year.
(CHUCKLES)
I'm sure we could rephrase.
MOLE: (GRUNTS)
We're at starvation levels!
We're all gonna die!
(ANIMALS MURMURING)
Now, now, now,
have optimism, brethren.
Stiff upper lip, everyone.
Ah! Here we are, food.
(ALL GASPING)
I'm afraid this is the
wrong kind of nut. Hmm...
Shiny.
(CHIRPING)
What's that? A nut cart?
A nut cart?
A nut cart? My eyes!
RACCOON: This could be
our salvation for winter.
Andie!
I'm on my way.
You won't regret this.
Uh-uh-uh.
Grayson is going with you.
With all due respect, sir, I can
do this on my own. I don't...
Grayson!
Ole!
(ALL SIGHING)
Chicks dig the tail.
(CLICKS TONGUE)
RACCOON: Help Andie retrieve as many
nuts from that cart as possible.
For the park!
ALL: For the park!
Oh! What she said.
And above all, keep a wary
watchful eye out for you-know-who.
No! Not him!
Yes, him.
Ho, ho, ho, come to daddy.
Hey, mack, you know where
the Oakton Bank is?
Oh, thanks.
(HORNS HONKING)
Where'd you learn to drive?
MAN: Moron!
(CLICKING)
(YAWNS)
(CONTINUES CLICKING)
GIRL: Hey, mister!
I want some nuts.
Scram, kid, we're closed.
The sign says you're open!
Burn rubber.
Did you hear me? I want nuts!
FINGERS: You want nuts?
GIRL: Nuts!
We got to get those nuts before the
rest of the park gets in on this.
Let's go over the plan.
That's us, there's the cart,
we rob the cart and then stuff
ourselves silly all winter.
(BUDDY WHISTLING)
What are you looking at?
Great. We got company.
Okay, we got to move.
Get in the pail.
Officer, that man,
he assaulted me with nuts.
- Oh, no.
- GIRL: It was horrible.
Now, listen,
Officer, that is not...
I need to see your vendor permits.
There it is.
Enough food to feed the park
for the entire winter.
That dog will make
it difficult, though.
Grayson? Grayson?
- Quiet. (SNIFFING)
- ANDIE: What are you doing?
I'm smelling for any sign of
that rascal, Surly Squirrel.
Picking up rather
strange scents, though.
Cashews, man musk,
(SNEEZES) dog hair.
I knew it. You stay here.
Honestly, woman, I am still
the park hero around here!
(CLICKS TONGUE)
Which reminds me, why haven't
you asked me out on a date?
Oh.
(LAUGHS)
(SNIFFING)
I smell a rat.
What are you doing here, Surly?
(SCREAMS)
FINGERS: Do you like cashews?
You want some cashews?
Who needs a permit
when you got nuts?
Great. So, you're
after this nut cart, too, huh?
Of course I am. The park needs it.
Well, too late, sister. Amscray.
Buddy and I got here first,
and I ain't sharing.
Oh, yes, you are.
Fall's half over and the park's
having the worst shortage in years.
That nut cart can feed everyone.
Hey, we'll work together.
We can work out a deal.
Uh, pass me that
metal thingy, will you?
(GROANS)
I just... I don't get it.
You have all the drive and ability
to help the park,
but you never do.
You know, this is a chance to
prove Raccoon is wrong about you.
I don't care what Raccoon thinks.
Well, then do it for the park. Stop
thinking about yourself all the time.
Look, I'm independent
and that means
looking out for number one.
I suggest you do the same
if you want to survive.
Got that?
I feel sorry for you, Surly.
A-ha!
Found him, Andie!
In a tree, no less.
Very crafty, Surly.
I shall now arrest you
before you interfere
with the park's nut cart caper.
It's okay, Grayson. I got him.
No, Grayson, she doesn't.
You better help her.
Well, you! I'm gonna...
Hey, Sugar Ray,
take the gloves off.
I'm just gonna rip your tail off.
Now, how about that date?
Listen, I'd love to keep chatting,
but I got a date with destiny.
Destiny, do I know her?
Buena suerte, chumps!
That was thrilling!
(GROANS)
That was painful.
(SIGHS)
This is going to end up bad.
LUCKY: Excuse me, Officer.
I happen to have
seen the whole thing.
This little girl might be
exaggerating a little bit...
I am not!
(GROANING)
FINGERS: Did you see that?
You're my witness.
LUCKY: Did you see that, Officer?
FINGERS: Yeah. Yeah,
she assaulted me, Officer!
I'm just an innocent citizen.
Aren't I right?
(SIGHS)
Aww, great.
(BARKING)
(GRUNTS)
(SNARLS)
Bon apptit.
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
(GROWLS)
Hey, your cart, it's getting away.
Holy Toledo!
Amscray.
(LAUGHING TRIUMPHANTLY)
Uh-oh.
Nuts!
What a woman!
(GRUNTING)
(WHIMPERS)
(INDISTINCT MUTTERING)
That just cost you 10%.
(SIGHS)
Ole! Did I save the day?
(ALL SCREAMING)
Grayson, try to get as much
food for the stock as you can.
(SNIFFING)
Hey, what's that smell?
That's my cologne, made from
tree sap and falcon tears.
- Get back.
- Hey, watch the tail.
Flammable here, come on.
These nuts are ours!
Huh?
These nuts are mine!
Okay, Surly, let's negotiate.
We can share it with the park.
Yeah, that sounds fair. How
about 100 me, zero for you?
(GRUNTS)
Wow!
They definitely don't have
a permit for that.
(LAUGHING MANICALLY)
No!
We have to stop this cart.
Photo op!
(GRUNTING)
Surly, come help me, man!
What? Curse you, Surly!
(LAUGHING)
Surly, you coward!
(SNICKERS)
Heck of a day.
Grayson, the oak tree.
The tally is in.
The food collected
in the trunk of our oak tree
(ALL GASP)
will not be enough
to carry us through winter.
(ALL GROAN)
I knew it! We're gonna die!
- Settle down, settle down now, please.
- Raccoon!
(SHUSHING)
Raccoon is giving a speech.
Though this outlook
appears disheartening...
Excuse me,
Andie and Grayson are on...
with determination and honor...
(CLICKING TONGUE)
You gotta listen to me.
this park will persevere!
Take heart, park brethren,
there is hope!
(ALL GASPING)
- Raccoon!
- Quiet.
I'd like to take this
moment to point out...
Quiet. Quiet.
(LAUGHING)
Grayson's never
let us down before.
I believe he is on his way right
at this very moment carrying...
Flaming cart of nuts!
What?
(GASPS)
(ANIMALS SCREAMING)
Our food! it will be destroyed!
Why didn't you say anything?
Abandon tree! Abandon tree!
(GRUNTS)
Not my perfectly
symmetrical face! No!
ALL: Phew!
ANIMAL: My goodness!
(POPCORN POPPING)
Grayson? Grayson?
Where are you?
What happened here?
(GROWLS)
Who is responsible for this?
SURLY: Let go of me, you clowns!
(GRUNTS)
You're making a big mistake here.
I got an alibi! I got witnesses.
(GROANS)
Found him hiding in one of our
holes, just like a snake.
I was recovering buried nuts,
that's what I was doing. (SNIFFING)
You guys smell, like, burnt
nuts or something? That me?
What's going... Ahh!
(LAUGHS)
Look at that!
You guys are
messed for winter, man!
I mean, wow!
Just look at that bonfire!
You didn't see
that coming, did you?
(SCREAMING)
(GROANS)
(ALL GASPING)
Never fear!
This sweet bod is undamaged!
Raccoon, let me organize the trial.
Just give the order.
Another trial? He's never learned.
He needs something more severe!
He is a clear and present danger!
You...
No, no, we do things
by the rule of law.
Let justice take care of him.
They want justice, Andie,
and justice they will receive.
All those in favor of
banishment, raise your paws!
- Banishment?
- Banishment?
Bandages? Yes, please.
Why are you hesitating?
He's refused to join us,
ridiculed our hard work,
stolen, cheated, lied,
and now destroyed our
only food for winter.
What say all?
And stick 'em up!
Why is the ground
moving towards my face?
We don't convict without a trial.
This isn't how we do things.
Uh...
I have run out of options
for that squirrel, Andie.
Do what you will,
do what is right.
Oh! (STAMMERS)
Buddy has not voted, and it has
to be unanimous, that's the rule.
You won't vote against me,
will you, old buddy?
Buddy?
You were saying?
(GEESE HONKING)
MOLE: By the authority granted by
Raccoon and the park community...
Oh! This is too high...
Surly Squirrel is
hereby banished to the city,
never to return to our
beloved Liberty Park.
Ugh! Can I please get down now?
You should have
had a trial, Surly.
I'm sorry.
(CLICKS TONGUE)
This is my punishment, Buddy.
Huh.
This ain't so bad.
(GASPS) Ahh!
(SCREAMS)
(CHOKES)
Oh! Filthy rat!
(GRUNTS)
(SIGHS)
(YELLS)
MAN: Hey! Whoa! Is that a rat?
WOMAN: Oh, my!
(SCREAMS)
Shoes. Shoes.
Gotta tail.
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
Hey!
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE)
(SNIFFLES)
(THUDDING)
(GROANS)
(SCREAMS)
No, no, no, Buddy, Buddy, Buddy,
speak to me, pal, come on.
Come on, snap out of it,
come on, speak to me, pal,
come on, come on,
come on, snap out of it.
(SIGHS)
Boy, it feels good to have a...
Hey, what are you doing?
Get your hands off me.
Beat it back to that park.
It's dangerous out here.
Besides,
you'll just get in my way.
I don't need anybody.
(RUSTLING)
You guys looking for
that squirrel? Me, too.
(CHUCKLES) Oops.
(PANTING)
(SHUSHING)
(RATS SNARLING)
(GASPS)
Hey, fellas,
come on, come on, come on.
I'm cool with rats.
My best friend's a rat.
There he is!
(SCREAMS)
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
(ALL COOING NERVOUSLY)
Go on, be free. Be free.
Come on, come on, come on.
(YELLS)
Buddy, Buddy, come on! Here we go.
(GRUNTING)
We did it. We're away.
Ha!
(GASPS)
(PIGEON SQUAWKING)
Whoa!
Let's go tell the boss.
(SOBBING)
I can't do this anymore.
No food, no home. Rat gangs.
I'm gonna die out here, Buddy.
I don't know, I mean, maybe
they could take me back.
I'd do public service. I'll
read to that blind woodchuck.
I'll even listen to Raccoon. I'll do
anything. I'll do whatever it takes to...
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
Okay. We get in.
We fill our bellies.
But we do it my way.
(JOINTS CRACKING)
(SCREAMS)
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
(GRUNTING)
Forget it, Buddy. That's not gonna work.
Let me handle this.
(CAR APPROACHING)
FINGERS: We got 100.
LUCKY: 20%. Twenty of 100,
that's what 20% is.
- You didn't go to school?
- Hey, hey!
Hey, hey!
Look who's here! It's the boss!
Fresh out of the slammer, huh?
How you doing, jailbird?
Hey, what's it been?
Eight years? Seven years?
Here. Let me get your jacket.
FINGERS:
No, no, no. I shall get that.
LUCKY: It's fine. I got it.
FINGERS: No, I got it.
LUCKY: I said it's all right.
(GRUNTS)
LUCKY: Just good to see you.
(WHISTLES)
Hey, Precious! Come here.
Say hi to the boss.
(WHIMPERS)
LUCKY: Say, boss, you look even
better than you did when you went in.
FINGERS:
Hey, boss, you got a new suit?
What is that?
Is that linen? Is that silk?
'Cause you look good.
Tell me it ain't Italian.
LUCKY: What a sharp dude.
Yeah. Hey...
KING: I want youse to meet
our new associate, Knuckles.
He'll be the weapons
and the safe expert.
Knuckles, say hello
to Fingers and Lucky.
Hiya, mack. Welcome aboard.
What's buzzin', cousin?
(CRACKS KNUCKLES)
All right.
So, which of you
geniuses found this place?
I did.
Ah, here we go.
I did. And look at all this nutty
stuff, boss. We even got a nut cart.
- KING: Uh-huh.
- Sorta.
It'll do.
We bought it for a song. And the
place is the perfect cover.
(CHUCKLES)
And the view is swell. All
right, let's get to it. Plans.
Just like we talked about.
Fat city.
Here's the bank.
Vault's right here.
Reinforced steel.
Solid as a rock.
That's why we got these babies.
(LAUGHS)
We go in with a bang,
and go out with the loot!
Here.
Kill the lights! Kill 'em!
FINGERS: Ah, just probably rats.
KING: Did you say rats?
(MUFFLED GRUNTING)
FINGERS: What's his problem?
(SCREAMS)
(BARKING)
Shut her up, Fingers!
I got this.
(HIGH-FREQUENCY WHISTLE)
(WHIMPERING)
Wow. You can hear my dog whistle?
(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE)
Can you hear this?
Like, if I talk, like, high?
Like this?
You kiddin' me? Really?
I'm not asking you
if you can hear, I'm ask...
(CHOKING)
Knock it off!
I got enough on my plate without
you two horsin' around, you dig?
Uh... Uh...
Hey, boss, let's show you
fellas the basement, huh?
(LAUGHING)
We barely have enough food
for the next three days,
let alone for the winter.
Make that food last.
It's all we can spare.
Come on, Grayson. Five more.
Let's go! Drop the purse, honey!
It's time to dance!
Okay! Yeah! Rope-a-dope!
All right!
Let's try cheek elasticity.
Yeah! Show 'em
what you got, Grayson!
JIMMY: Come on, Grayson.
Stretch those cheeks.
Do you really think Grayson
should be coming with me?
I don't think he's recovered
from that hit on the head.
Raccoon thinks it would be good for
morale during these hard times.
After all,
Grayson is the park hero.
What a champ!
Good luck, my dear.
Find food for us.
For the park.
Our hopes go with you.
Ole!
We know you'll find food.
Take me with you!
JIMMY: (LAUGHS)
And you should have great weather!
80% chance of sunshine!
0% chance of winter!
Take me with you!
Be careful! The city is full of
germs and bright blinding lights.
Oh, the sun's coming up.
I must take refuge in the safety
of darkness. Out of my way!
Bye!
Look at us! Off on a heroic quest!
I couldn't think of a better way
to celebrate our anniversary.
Hey! We are not dating.
This is an important mission
to find food. Right?
You're right. We're
past those silly labels.
Ours is a love...
RAT: Well, Well, Well.
(LAUGHS)
Isn't this a tender little scene?
I'll handle this.
Hello, urban rodent thing!
Is that mange or bubonic
plague you're wearing?
Anyway, my lady and I were hoping
you could point out the...
Hey! Put the...
Hey! Give her back that backpack!
Backpack! Give it pack!
Pack! Back!
(GRUNTING)
Hey!
(GROANS)
ANDIE: Grayson!
Ole!
A-ha!
(TRAM BELL RINGS)
(GASPS)
GRAYSON: Go on without me!
Save the park!
(YAWNS)
(FARTS)
Buddy, I ate too much cheese.
(FARTING)
I think I'm gonna
have a cheese baby.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER ON RADIO)
Going down.
Son of a gun.
Lana...
Gee, Lana, you look swell.
Lana, crazy dame.
Hey, ain't you got
a nickel to call first?
No need. Your ma told me
where to find you, King.
Look at that! It's Lana!
(BARKING)
And who are you,
you slobbery little monster?
FINGERS: She's a vicious guard dog.
(CHUCKLES)
She's not very good at her job.
LUCKY: She's not the only one.
FINGERS:
What's that supposed to mean?
- LUCKY: Nothin'.
- FINGERS: What do you mean, nothing?
LUCKY: I said nothin'.
LANA: I wouldn't have believed it,
but you really have gone legit.
Talk about second chances,
it's boss.
KING: Yeah, well, you keep
it under your hat, though,
'cause, I mean, we ain't open yet,
and we wanna have a surprise
grand opening. Right, boys?
(BARKING)
Oh! Not again!
(HIGH-FREQUENCY WHISTLE)
(WHIMPERING)
Hey! My Whistle!
FINGERS:
I wanna be reimbursed for that!
(SNARLING)
- Ahh! Oh! Rat!
- FINGERS: Boss!
- It's a rat!
- FINGERS: Hang on!
Get it off of me!
Get this rat off of me!
It's down my pants!
Get it out of here!
Get it off of me! Please!
(BARKING)
Next chance we get, we go back in
there and stash away those nuts.
Can't go back to the park, though.
Ah, forget it. Let's go get
that shiny thing. Here we go!
No. And that's not...
(GRUNTS)
(LAUGHING)
The thingamabooby is mine!
(SURLY GROANS)
Surly!
- What are you doing here?
- What are you doing here?
- I'm looking for food.
- I'm looking for food.
- No! I'm looking for food!
- No! I'm looking for food!
Hey, did you find food?
No. No food.
Can I have that back, please?
Why? What is this thing?
It's just my musical instrument
for playing the blues.
I got no friends, no food
This whistle has nothing
to do with food
Oh, I've got the no food blues
For heaven's sakes!
You found food, didn't you?
And this thing has
something to do with it.
That's crazy!
Spill the beans, or I...
Whoa!
Let's not get too nutty around here.
Pardon the expression.
Surly, I'm having a heck of a day!
The park lost all its food,
Grayson lost his mind,
now I've lost Grayson.
I've been out hungry and alone
and getting real irritable!
So, either you start talking,
or come winter,
I'll be wearing a new
squirrel-skin coat. Capisce?
The door.
ANDIE: What? What door?
SURLY: Nothing.
Just that my door is always open
to you, Andie. But we gotta go.
Come back here! Hey!
And hold on to that thing, okay?
(PANTING)
(WHISTLES)
(LAUGHS)
(WHIMPERS)
Ooh! Ow! Tail!
Head! Tail! Head! Tail!
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Buddy, we found it!
The lost city of Nutlantis!
(LAUGHING)
FINGERS:
I've been working on a bank heist
All the live long day
LUCKY:
Stop with the singing, will you?
Can you believe this?
I can't believe this!
Can you hear what
I'm saying to you?
(LAUGHING)
FINGERS: And what's with that guy
cracking his knuckles all the time?
You know that's gonna lead to a
serious arthritic condition.
Thanks, chum. Sorry about that.
Went a little nuts.
I didn't say
anything stupid, did I?
(GRUNTING)
FINGERS: Hey, how much is 20%?
LUCKY: You kidding me?
FINGERS:
Is it a lot or is it a little?
LUCKY: You're not serious, are you?
Twenty of 100 is 20%.
Ah, burying nuts for winter, huh?
All right, listen up.
We're gonna dig our own hole, a
tunnel from here to the alley,
loot the whole place, get
fat for winter. Got it?
20%. Twenty of 100, that's what
20% is. You didn't go to school?
(GROWLS)
What's wrong with her?
Probably complaining about the
substandard working conditions here.
LUCKY:
All right, brainiac, let's move.
FINGERS: You got an attitude.
Here we go!
(GROWLING)
(PRECIOUS BARKING)
Whoa!
(YELLING)
All right, Surly, you're gonna
tell me what's going on in there.
(PRECIOUS BARKING)
Yes! Yes! Just give me that thing!
There's food in there
for the park, isn't there?
And you're gonna share it, right?
- Never!
- Fine!
All right! Share! I'll share!
- Fifty-fifty.
- Fifty-fifty?
I've never gone 50-50 in my life.
Fifty-fifty! Fifty-fifty!
Deal!
Ha-ha!
(GASPS)
- I got four words for ya.
- Okay!
Thing-a-ma-booby.
- Ugh!
- How do you like that, huh?
- Okay, you win, you win!
Get that thing out of my face!
- Huh? Oh.
You got me.
So, you can talk.
Okay, I'll stop talking, then.
Just don't blow that whistle.
SURLY:
I'm not gonna feel sorry for you.
- Of course, yes, I understand.
- Stay.
All right, it's safe to come down.
I'm gonna level with you, 'cause
you seem like a reasonable guy.
If I don't get rid of you,
they are gonna send me back
to the pound, all right?
And I can't go back to that pound.
SURLY: Oh, yeah, sure.
I believe you.
No, I'm a victim of circumstance.
Not my problem, dog. You guys okay?
Don't worry about her.
This is incredible!
There's enough food here
to feed the park for years!
Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What're you doing?
Look, can we be friends?
- Oh, great.
- Come on!
I can do all sorts of stuff.
You wanna see? You know what?
I can fetch things. Huh?
I can sit.
Look at this thing! This is crazy!
Whoo, whoo, whoo.
Has a mind of its own.
Oh, Oh, Oh!
I can play dead! Watch.
(GROANS)
Now I'm alive.
I mean, this is unbelievable.
It's like one to the next.
Dead, then alive. Right?
I'm getting some of this food
back to the park.
- SURLY: What?
- We had a deal.
Well, I can attack her,
if you want.
I said, shut it.
Look, the deal is, you take
your share, I get mine,
we split ways.
There's no way I can get
these to the park safely.
We need a foolproof plan.
Good luck with that. Buddy
and I are digging a tunnel.
(LAUGHS)
That's just... That's crazy.
No. It's brilliant!
Oh, Raccoon and the animals will
flip when they hear about this!
We'll be back, first thing tomorrow,
to get started on a tunnel.
That's not part of the deal.
Should I attack her now?
What? No! You stay!
I never said that
I'd work with the park.
Well, you're welcome to come
back with me, if you want.
Who knows, you might just
end up being a hero.
I'll be back with the team.
Well done, Surly!
Put a tail on her.
You know what I mean.
Hey, boss, I'm gonna
lick your face.
Come on, don't be weird.
MOLE: I propose we assemble a team
and take the nuts for the park!
ALL: Yeah!
See? See, everybody?
What did I tell ya?
The sunshiny days are here again.
Okay. Okay, wait. Wait! But
we have to work with Surly.
That's right! We are working with...
Are you nuts?
I negotiated a deal with him.
We split everything, 50-50.
Negotiate?
With Surly? Are you kidding me?
He's the reason we don't
have any nuts to begin with!
ANDIE: No! No!
(ALL PROTESTING)
Hey, listen. For as long as
this old mill has stood,
we have always worked together
and kept our promises.
We are not a pack of wild animals!
(BURPS)
These two are animals.
(CHUCKLING)
Winter is coming.
If we don't work with Surly,
we won't survive.
Did Grayson see this nut supply?
No. Um... We got separated.
Let's all wait until
Grayson gets back...
We don't know
if Grayson's ever coming back.
(ALL GASPING)
ANIMAL 1:
Grayson's not coming back? What?
- No!
- ANIMAL 2: Terrible.
MOUSE: Wait. Who's
gonna be handsome, then?
RACCOON:
I have come to a decision.
The Bruisers, Mole and Andie will
dig a tunnel to get the nuts out.
Mole will lead.
A-ha!
I will?
And while I don't trust Surly,
we will work with him. For now.
When all the nuts are secure,
we will take what is ours.
We do not honor deals with Surly.
For the park!
ALL: For the park! Yeah!
Why aren't we doing this at night?
All right, let's get to work!
Stand back!
Guys, the nut store is over there.
Allow me.
Ha!
(GRUNTING)
So, what do you think? Green wire?
Hmm. Read my mind.
Wait. We don't know what that...
Andie, I am in charge.
Proceed, my dear.
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)
(BRUISERS SCREAMING)
No! Sis, wake up! Wake up, sis!
Jamie! Wake up, sis! Come on...
Disperse!
I have been trained in mouth-to-mouth
resuscitative measures.
She's fine.
(WHISTLES)
(ALL GASPING)
Grayson?
I've been casing
this place for days.
Every hole, vent, trap and
window is mapped in my head.
You wanna break into this
joint, survive the winter,
you talk to me.
KING: We cut the alarm
wire from the tunnel.
When you two hit the vault,
we got three minutes to dynamite
it and get that dough out.
We dig here, from the
alley into the basement.
Why don't we just
use the door thing?
Too unpredictable. They lock it
from the inside.
Now, listen closely.
We fill the vault
with bags of nuts.
We seal it,
we head for state lines.
It'll be days before the bank
realizes they got peanuts on deposit.
Agreed?
Agreed. But I do not dig.
'Cause you're blind as a bat.
What? Who said that?
Where are you?
What kinda haul
are we talking, pops?
We're talking almonds,
pistachios, walnuts, Brazils...
Enough cashews
to buy yourselves a racetrack.
And did I mention
the peanut brittle?
That a candy or a nut?
(LAUGHING)
Both.
(LAUGHS)
Now, listen up.
This is my last heist.
I ain't going back to that
rat-filled slammer, you dig?
That's all we've been doing!
JIMMY: Fire in the hole!
(FARTS)
(BRUISERS COUGHING)
I'm gonna kill you!
What's going on down...
(SCREAMING)
JAMIE:
It's the same thing every time.
We keep running into this
hard brick-colored substance.
Do you mean brick?
We can't speculate on
what is or isn't brick,
but suffice to say,
this material has a high number
of brick-like properties.
(FARTS)
Okay, cut it out! Who is that?
I guess there's no other choice.
JIMMY: Hey, hey, wait a minute.
JAMIE:
We're not falling for it again!
No, no, no, I'm serious. There's
a loose brick over here.
Yeah. Yeah.
Definitely a loose brick.
Hey, hey, Johnny. Johnny! Hey,
I got a loose brick over here.
Come here, come on,
help me with this.
Got it. Come on!
Together, let's do this!
Yeah! Come on, let's move it.
- Yeah. Here we go.
- Hey.
Was this open the whole time?
I don't know. I just got here.
Come on, how about that face lick?
Lick yourself.
Hey, what are those guys doin'?
Digging for bones. Move it.
- JIMMY: Come on, Johnny!
- JOHNNY: Heave!
Okay, we can do this.
I think it's moving.
JIMMY: Come on, heave. Heave.
Yeah, yeah. That's it.
That's it. You're doing great.
Keep up the, uh...
What do you call that? The teamwork.
Yeah, good for you.
She's moving.
Make it last! Heave! Kick it!
Heave! Heave!
Here you go, guys! Here you...
(GASPS)
Where's Surly?
Hey, guys. Look what I found.
Isn't it great?
- Come on. Come on.
- No!
Come get it!
No! Let go!
I cannot stop!
- No, let go of the stick.
- It's impossible!
Let go of the stick!
I do not know how to
let go of the stick.
Let go of this!
All right, fine!
Hey, Surly.
(MUFFLED EXPLOSION)
(BOTH SCREAMING)
What'd you have for breakfast?
(GASPS) You brought nuts!
ALL:
Hey, all right! Way to go, Surly!
Way to go, Surly!
I'm dead!
(ALL SCREAMING)
They'd have sent me back
to that dog pound, Surly,
I know it, I just know it!
What am I gonna do? What am
I gonna do? You gotta help me!
I'll do whatever you say.
(SOBBING) Whatever you say.
(ALL COUGHING)
Hey, what happened here?
What happened?
I want some answers!
Say, fellas. Look!
That squirrel was trying
to blow up the nut store,
and Precious stopped him!
Can you believe it?
Good pup! Good pup!
What's wrong with you?
Get that wall cemented up.
From now on,
I want that coal chute
shut at all times, you hear me?
Give the mutt a treat.
Now cement that wall up!
That dog is one smart dog.
She's smarter than you.
She's smarter than you!
She's smarter than me?
No one's smarter than me.
No one's smarter than you.
That's right!
Right! I'm glad we're
in agreement, for once.
LUCKY: Of course.
(CRASHING)
Surly?
Hey, what's going on?
This trashcan has a hole in it.
We use it as cover to dig a new
hole into the human hole. No brick.
Now that's groundhog thinking,
right there.
Okay, well, how long will it take?
Day or two. Depending on any
pipes or rocks we come across.
It'll be three days.
It'll be two days!
- Three!
- You wanna take this to the ground?
Ridiculous! It'll never work!
You'll need Raccoon's approval.
You kiddin' me?
Raccoon's gonna love this idea!
Yeah. Raccoon. Guy's not even here
and he's still ruining my life.
I gotta tell ya,
the nerve of those bums!
The nerve of those bums!
"Raccoon would approve of this!"
Oh, really? Raccoon! That guy,
he's a bigger thief than I am!
But those blockheads can't see it.
They're blind as Mole.
I'm the brains of this outfit. I'm
the guy with the... The brains.
Did I already say that?
Raccoon's nothing
but a lying old sack of fur!
What?
(COOING)
Hey, Surly, over here.
(CLEARS THROAT)
What...
What are you doing here?
Aren't you supposed to be working
on that tunnel? Raccoon's orders.
There's something
you need to know.
I haven't been completely honest.
Yeah. Right.
(SIGHS)
Raccoon's planning
to double-cross you.
We were all in on it. I'm
sorry, but just seeing how...
Raccoon's always had it
out for me. And besides,
who says I'm helping?
But you are helping us,
aren't you?
I'm helping myself.
Right. My mistake.
Just remember, Surly,
that park needs those nuts.
Do what you will.
I didn't authorize
any handouts, did I?
You know Andie. it was her idea.
Are you looking for these?
(GASPS)
I know Andie. She lacks
obedience. Can't follow orders.
But she follows Surly.
You know, he even tamed
that guard dog?
He could actually pull this off.
(SCREAMS)
The day Surly saves
this park is the day
nuts will rain from the skies!
Hmm.
There could be an accident.
(SCREAMING)
Have you considered sabotage?
What? Hey, what's gotten into you?
It's only Surly,
a two-bit trash can thief.
It's not about thievery.
It's about that food
getting to those animals.
Have you forgotten my motto?
"Animals are controlled by the
amount of food they have."
- "It is our duty...
- "It's our duty...
- "...to keep it from them."
- "...to keep it from them."
Good. Now, where were we?
Ah, yes. Sabotage.
Yeah, sabotage.
Um... What is that, French?
(CLATTERING)
(GRUNTING)
What are you up to, Mole?
(BOTH SCREAMING)
Grayson?
Surly? Ha!
- Hey. Hey.
- Surly! Surly!
- Hands off. What's wrong with you?
- Thank goodness!
Everything's wrong with me!
I've been out there
with the people,
and the cars, and the cats, and...
Rat! It's a rat!
Hold me! No, I'll hold you!
Whack job! What're you doing?
You're drowning me in...
Drown.
Buddy, watch him.
And keep him away
from sharp objects.
Okay, how about this one?
(BURPS)
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Mole, what are you doing?
(SCREAMS)
Wait, wait. Is that water?
- Let's get out of here!
- Whoa!
(GRUNTING)
(BOTH SCREAMING)
(CHIRPING)
I'm gettin' me a pettin' zoo.
What are you gettin'?
- A new partner.
- That's it!
Hey, can it! You hear somethin'?
No.
(SCREAMS)
(BOTH COUGHING)
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
(MUFFLED SCREAMS)
(PHONE RINGING)
SURLY: Dog! Dog! Open up!
Dog, dog, open up! Dog, get out here!
This bird's gonna kill me!
KING: Yeah? Lana...
SURLY: Come on, come on, come on!
Do it now! Do it now! Hurry up!
Honey, not now, no.
I can't talk right now
'cause we're...
LANA:
Come on! All the guys are asking!
Potty break? Now?
No, no, no. Not you, honey.
No, no. Look, sweetie...
(CARDINAL TWITTERING)
(PRECIOUS GROANS)
What was that? Ma, is that you?
Get to the alley
and stop the water!
Stop the water. Got it.
Hey, you're not the boss of me!
Apparently, you are. I love you.
First stop water, then lick face.
Surly, what are you doing?
Shoot that rodent! Shoot it!
(GROWLING)
(BOTH COUGHING)
Quick! Where's the shut-off valve?
FINGERS: I smell a rat, boss!
Rats did this? Find the rat.
FINGERS: I'm confused
as to what kind of rats
we're talking about here, boss.
It's him! There he is, the rat!
Are they okay? Huh?
They're gonna be fine.
Hey, don't tell the other dogs
we're friends, all right?
It wouldn't look good.
Ooh! That guy needs glasses!
- Dog!
- Got it! Hey!
(GRAYSON SCREAMING)
Surly! You left me!
Wait, man, don't leave me alone!
There is a crazed rat up there!
- Hey, wait! Hey!
- Grayson?
(SCREAMS)
Is that you?
(LAUGHS) Shut the front door!
What are you two doing here?
(SCREAMS)
(BARKING)
(GRUNTING)
PRECIOUS: Face lick!
SURLY: That's not his face.
(SCREAMS)
So, you're the mole,
double entendre intended!
Nah, I'm a chicken.
I saw you sabotage our tunnel.
Was it Raccoon? Talk!
Hey, you want me to hurt him?
Keep a lookout.
(SIGHS) Yeah, boss.
Do your worst. Go on!
I am a sealed vault,
resistant to questioning.
A tough nut to crack. A
concrete pillar. A jar with a...
(SCREAMING)
My retinas! Raccoon's
trying to stop the heist!
I'm not buying it.
(SCREAMING)
Less food means more control!
If the heist succeeds, Raccoon
will lose control of the park!
But so what? You don't care
about the park, do you?
I don't. But when I tell
the team, I'll get double.
You think they'll
believe a criminal like you?
After what I did for them?
Oh, they'll listen.
Yeah, don't kid yourself.
(SNARLS)
(SCREAMS)
JIMMY: Oh, man! There was
water all over the place!
Johnny was choking, I was choking,
and then the next thing you know,
there's Grayson! He saved my butt!
He saved my butt!
- It was my butt.
- Oh, yeah?
Stop talking about butts.
Talk about me.
I'll kick both your butts!
Come here! Come here!
Grayson, I'm so glad you're...
JAMIE:
Great to have you back, Grayson!
JOHNNY: It's been a disaster.
We had to work with Surly.
Surly?
(LAUGHING) Surly!
They think I shaved their butts.
JAMIE: Surly!
Careful! They come hither!
What happened? You were up here.
You ready for this piece of news?
It was Mole.
Saw him try to drown the twins.
He confessed to everything.
Mole?
It was all Raccoon's idea.
So, you're blaming Raccoon because
he kicked you out of the park.
No, I'm not.
Raccoon has never
harmed us before.
But he sure has!
Hey, listen. I just wanna get
my cut and split, all right?
- Grayson...
- GRAYSON: Yes!
You were there.
I was! Wait... Where?
You think it was me, don't you?
No! No one said that.
Just explain yourself.
Buddy, did you see anything?
Wait, you're asking him?
He can't help you.
You're wasting your time!
He's useless! Can't speak!
Only knows how to take orders!
Kinda like you, Andie.
Is that how you treat the
only animal who defends you?
- No. No.
- You lousy...
Just let him go.
That tunnel is open now.
We get our share out before morning.
Let him take his.
JIMMY: We can't trust him!
We let him go. Honor the deal.
Bye, Surly! Come back soon!
I mean, stay away!
I dislike you strongly!
Hey, Surl, are we gonna get
the team together? Huh?
Do another heist?
No. Now's a bad time.
Oh. Oh, yeah.
I get it. Okay, not now.
So how about now, huh?
I said no.
Job's done. Team's done.
You need a lookout? Huh? Huh?
Now, get back to your humans.
I'm on my own now.
We're playing that game again!
All right.
No. No! Get out of here! Scat!
Hey, look what you made me do.
Whoa! Whoa!
(YELPING)
PRECIOUS:
No! Surly! Watch out, it's a...
(GASPS)
(SNICKERS)
FINGERS: What are we
gonna do with him, boss?
Shut it and grab me
that blowtorch.
(PRECIOUS BARKING)
(GASPS)
Lana...
Yeah, right. Good seeing you.
Nice seeing you, Lana.
We gotta go do, uh, tunnel stuff.
So now you know.
When were you gonna tell me, King?
I already told you before.
You can't change who you are.
LUCKY: Boss, come here!
Well, go on. Rob your
bank, already!
This really is my last job.
Boss! Come on!
LUCKY: Hey, hey!
(MEN LAUGHING)
This is it. A goldmine
right over our heads!
Let's blow this thing.
What about Lana?
(PRECIOUS WHINES)
But I don't have the whistle.
I know.
RAT: Hold him down!
Hold him down! That's it.
(CHUCKLES)
RACCOON:
Well, what do we have here?
A hero or a thief?
You think you can starve the
park to stay in control?
Mole told me everything.
What? What's he talking about?
I didn't say anything!
He's loopy! Yeah. Cuckoo,
you know, nuts. Whoo-hoo!
Is this another
one of your swindles?
Some half-baked
revenge against me?
(GRUNTS)
RACCOON: It's something else, isn't it?
You're trying to impress.
Grayson, perhaps. Andie?
RACCOON: Oh, I see.
No matter. My accomplices will
take care of them soon enough.
They don't follow me.
They hate me. They hate me!
Maybe, but I can't
leave any evidence, Surly.
Every good thief knows that.
Hey, this is getting a little
crazy, don't you think? I mean...
Maybe we'll finish you off next!
And where's that shiny thing
he's supposed to have?
KING:
All right, this is it. Ten, nine...
You'll get the rest once you
dispose of Andie and Grayson.
I'll finish off Mr. Hero myself.
The park'll get rid of you.
They'll vote in new leaders.
How many leaders do you think
this park can have?
Three, two...
One!
(ANIMALS COUGHING)
He'll warn the others!
What are you waiting for?
After him!
Bingo, boys.
(LAUGHING) Hey, hey!
Hey, look at all this moolah!
Load the dough into the trucks.
And let's get out of here.
You two, stick the nuts in
the vault and seal it up.
What are you gonna
do with your money, huh?
FINGERS: Pettin' zoo!
I'm gonna buy me three pettin'
zoos, and give you two of 'em!
And ponies!
Don't forget the ponies!
Pretty little ponies!
They're so soft and cuddly.
One more!
What the... I told you to load
those nuts into the vault.
Yeah, so why did you take
the cart out of the tunnel?
What kind of game
are you playing here?
What kind of game are you playing?
Relax, we probably
just bumped the cart.
Or maybe it was rats!
Holy Toledo!
LUCKY: Watch out.
KING: I'll handle these rats.
(GUN FIRING)
- Squirrels!
- Watch out!
- Hang on, Fingers!
- Hey!
(RAT SQUEALING)
- KING: Get going.
- Okay.
LUCKY: What about you?
What, are you deaf?
I said, get going!
FINGERS: It was going so smooth!
(BOTH GASP)
Grayson, you moron!
Surly, I need a disguise!
Something flamboyant!
What? Get your head
out of your tail!
Lead the team into the tunnel
and escape through our hole.
I'll distract the big guy.
I'll need some skates, a
mustache and maybe a cape.
You don't need a cape.
I can't help the park alone.
I'm not a hero, but you are.
Last summer,
during that heat wave,
who discovered that broken sprinkler
so everyone could have water?
I did?
That's right! They believe in heroes.
So snap out of it and be one.
It's hero time.
It's hero time! Why am I shouting?
Rats!
Rats! Run! Run for your lives!
Children and Grayson first! Run!
It's Grayson!
- He's come to save us!
- Run! Get out of my way! Run!
Now is our chance. Let's go!
Move it, everybody! Move! Move!
(YELLING)
(GASPS)
(SCREAMING)
Mole? What are you doing here?
Andie, thank goodness you're here.
Raccoon?
Surly is planning to
double-cross us all.
He confessed everything.
What? He said it's you and Mole
who tried to drown The Bruisers.
But he's working for Surly.
(STAMMERING) What?
(BOTH SCREAMING)
Would you stop doing that?
Jimmy, Johnny, get to the park
and bring more animals to help.
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.
- Out of the way. Out of the way.
- Me first.
Rest of us will unload the
nuts from that van there.
For the park!
Come on, guys!
I know what I'm going to
spend some of my money on.
Whoa! Look at that, Buddy!
Celebrate later. This van
could move at any time.
JAMIE: Start unloading.
Raccoon, I'm sorry I doubted you.
ALL: Raccoon! Open this door!
Raccoon! Open the door!
ANDIE:
Raccoon! Open this door right now!
JAMIE: Open it! Open the door!
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
Let him go. It won't
change the plan.
GRAYSON: Ole! Ole! Ole!
(GRAYSON LAUGHING)
Amazing!
But that will.
Whee!
GRAYSON: I am enjoying myself!
(SCREAMS)
Bank to the left! Higher!
GRAYSON: Ole! Ole! Ole!
We gotta get everybody out
of this van. Find a way in.
Follow me! This...
(LAUGHS EVILLY)
Oh, boy!
(BOTH LAUGHING)
- Hey, we did it, Fingers.
- Yeah!
Easy street!
I gotta take a look.
Ooh, yeah!
What?
Nothing but nuts.
- We've been had!
- What?
No money! Those dirty rats!
Hey, hey, Squirrel!
That's right, a squirrel!
It's that squirrel! And a bird?
Looks like they're on to us.
Time to end this little charade.
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Turn around!
I can't see!
Go after 'em!
(GRUNTING)
(GROANING)
(SQUAWKING)
(CARDINAL SQUEAKS)
(CATS MEOWING)
(GASPING)
ANDIE: We can do this.
Whoa!
(ALL GROAN)
ANDIE: Come on, try again.
We need Grayson.
(SCREAMING)
Grayson, are you there?
Not to worry, I'm perfectly safe.
(SCREAMS)
(SCREAMING)
Help!
Oh!
Thank you! Thank you!
Mole, quit clowning around
and help us open this door.
Give me a boost, Grayson.
Ole!
Grayson! He's here to save us!
Oh.
- Let me explain!
- Let's get him, guys!
Hey, wait a second.
Forget him. The door's open.
We can push the nuts out.
A-ha!
- What...
- Raccoon!
You can't...
Let go, you idiot!
RACCOON: Help me throw him
off before he kills us all!
Kill us? This squirrel is a hero!
Well, co-hero, actually.
Raccoon is the double-crosser!
You have to believe me!
Hang on, Mole!
What does it look like I'm doing?
(SCREAMING)
Why did you lock us in here?
You're wasting time!
This is our one opportunity to
rid the park of this villain.
For the park!
You still haven't
answered the question.
This is treason. Andie!
Answer the question, Raccoon.
Was Surly telling the truth?
Answer!
GRAYSON: I call for a vote!
Agreed!
All those in favor of
banishment, raise your paws!
(GROWLS)
ANDIE: Raccoon!
Shiny!
Hey!
(LAUGHING EVILLY)
(SIRENS WAILING)
State lines are
just past this dam.
Then we are home free.
(THUMP)
You're the thief.
Not Surly.
He was right about you.
(GUN COCKING)
Hey, hey! No, no, no,
there's dynamite back there.
Huh?
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Hmm.
OFFICER ON MEGAPHONE:
All right, boys,
we've got you
completely surrounded.
Come out with your hands up!
Out! Now!
I saw this coming.
No, you didn't.
(GASPING)
Mole, where is everybody?
Still inside. But Andie's in
the other van with Raccoon.
You can't stop him alone.
Surly, what's happened to you?
FINGERS:
All I wanted was a pettin' zoo.
You'll never get away with this.
(SOBBING)
I want my mommy.
They've got hostages. Stand down.
(FINGERS CRYING)
ALL: Whoa!
Holy Toledo!
Whoa! I bet it was that squirrel!
Enough with the squirrels!
Andie. Andie.
(GASPS)
Surly?
(GASPS) Oh!
(BOTH SCREAMING)
(BOTH GASPING)
Whoa!
(COUGHS)
Andie? Andie?
(THUDDING)
KING: We can still save the cash.
Hey, where you going?
What are you doing?
There's more money.
Ha-ha.
What are you
trying to prove, Surly?
Raccoon, it's not stable.
Why are you doing this? Tell me.
(GRUNTS)
(LAUGHS)
Buddy! Atta boy, pal!
(HIGH-FREQUENCY WHISTLE)
(GROANS)
The shiny! Give it to me!
(SCREAMING)
Not so fast, thief!
No!
Look, Surly and Raccoon!
They'll go over the falls.
Everyone, come on.
(SCREAMING)
ANDIE: I got you.
JAMIE: Don't let go.
MOLE: Hold on!
JAMIE: You can do it.
ANDIE: Raccoon, climb up!
GRAYSON: Let go! No, don't let go!
We can save both of you! Hurry!
Never! You backstabbing vermin!
Surly goes down with me!
Buddy, that was some score.
We almost pulled it off,
didn't we?
Surly, don't you dare let go.
I'm sorry, Andie!
- What?
- No!
Surly, no!
(SCREAMS)
Is it?
(GASPS) Look!
- It's Grayson!
- ANIMALS: Grayson!
Thank you. Thank you.
No autographs, please.
You can admire the tail,
but no touching.
ANIMALS: Grayson! Yeah!
GRAYSON: Thank you!
The wheel! Jump!
Thank you! Thank you. You're welcome.
You're welcome.
Grayson!
What's going on here?
(SCREAMS)
(SCREAMING)
(GROANS)
Ha! Never fear!
JIMMY: Grayson!
You two guys are here, too?
Hi!
Ha-ha! Come on, guys!
ANIMALS: Let's go!
(GASPS)
(BOTH SCREAMING)
Rats! It's a rat!
It's a rat...
(SOBBING)
Take me away, Officers. Take me away.
Just save me from the rats.
Percy "King" Dimpleweed,
you and I are officially through.
Come on, let's go.
(SOBBING)
Hey, Precious,
where you going, girl?
Precious?
PRECIOUS: Psst! Buddy.
Come with me.
Best... Friend.
(HOWLING)
(HOWLING CONTINUES)
(SURLY COUGHS)
What are you looking at?
Wait, Buddy. Did you just speak?
Okay, okay, okay,
enough, enough, enough.
I get it, you like me, I get it.
LANA: Precious! Precious!
Okay, Surly, so, see
you at the nut store.
Wait, what? That place?
Yeah, Lana's the new owner.
Hey, no more whistles, huh?
Just face licks.
Oh, hi, Andie.
Surly!
When you went over those falls,
I thought I'd never see you again.
Oh! We got to go. Come on.
Okay, calm down.
Where are we going?
You risked your life to save this park.
Everyone has to know.
No.
The team saved the park.
GRAYSON:
Okay, stop touching the tail.
Stop touching. Stop.
Stop touching the tail!
(SIGHS)
So then what are you going to do?
I'm gonna keep
finding food for this park.
But from now on,
we do it together.
Deal?
This park will always
honor your deals, Surly.
SURLY: Yeah, they say life's
there for the taking,
but the truth is,
life's really there
for the sharing.
Huh.
Once you realize that,
you might discover there's a
little hero in all of us.
After all, we're all a little nuts.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
(KOREAN POP SONG PLAYING)
(SINGING)
(BARKS)
Any more big ideas?
(CHIRPS)
Please stay.
(PRECIOUS BARKS)
(PANTING)
(BARKING)
(SCREAMS)
(CRASHING)
(HIGH-FREQUENCY WHISTLE)
(WHIMPERING)


 

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I hate power companies. Just had a two second power outage that completely f'd  up a back up I was doing. Was up to 92 percent. Now I have to do it yet again from the beginning and I don't have a lot of space left. angrykong;

 

Not bothering right now though until I find out what the hell is going on with the power. I can't afford yet another outage.


Found out it was even worse... a power surge.

Edited by Doc Brown
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8 hours ago, Blue.Frog said:

@ace

 

Im gonna come to shoprite and order 40 sandwiches and have you make them for me xoxo

jokes on you i was working on prepacked sliced deli meats today.

Let me tell you about boring jobs. Loading shit onto a machine and watching it go is not terribly exciting.

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Spoiler

There is a place.
A place that knows no sadness.
Where even feeling blue is a happy thing.
A place inhabited by little blue beings
three apples high.
It lies deep in an enchanted forest,
hidden away beyond a medieval village.
Most people believe this place is made up,
only to be found in books
or in children's imaginations.
Well, we beg to differ.
Yeah! Come on, Farmer!
I'm going in!
All right, Greedy, I'm gonna race you!
Yes!
Whoa, golly! Farm boys love to fly!
Oh, yeah! So excited!
Now you see us, now you don't!
Three, two, one. Yeah!
Yeah! I love smurf berries! Hey, hey!
The blue ones are mine!
Oh, no! I'm late for rehearsal! I am so late!
In Smurf village, each and every Smurf
plays their own special pad.
- Whoa, Nellie!
- Sorry, Handy!
No problem, Clumsy. You keep me employed!
Which gives the Smurfs a sense of harmony.
- Hey, Baker! Nice pies!
- No worries, Clumsy.
- And tranquility.
- Great sign, guys!
- Whether it's Handy Smurf the builder
- I can't stay. Rehearsal time!
- Baker Smurf.
- Hey, Narrator Smurf!
Hello, Clumsy! Just rehearsing the intro
for the Blue Moon Festival!
- Pizza!
- Pardon me! Pardon me! Hey, Chef Smurf!
Clumsy! Help!
I just invented frozen pizzas! Genius!
Smurf on the loose!
- Hey, Clumsy.
- Hey, guys!
- Hi, Jokey!
- Hi, Clumsy.
Who's clumsy now, huh?
Hey, what do you get when you cross
a Smurf with a cow?
Blue cheese! I got you a present.
No, thanks, Jokey. I'm late for rehearsal!
But, wait! I...
Hey, Grouchy. Hey, Gutsy.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow your roll, sailor.
Hey, wait, wait. Isn't that the rehearsal
for the Blue Moon Festival?
What can I say, Clumsy?
You're not on the list.
Grouchy, it's right there.
Right. Under "Do not let in Clumsy."
Clearly you two
lack the verbal skills required
- to explain this predicament succinctly.
- Hey!
- Here we go.
- You see, Clumsy,
the other Smurfs don't want to dance
with you for fear of what are politely called
"fractures."
How could anybody think that?
That's gonna leave a big blue bruise.
Wonderful! Beautiful! Marvelous.
Watch it, there!
Cut! Cut! Cut! It's a dance, not dominoes.
- A worry line!
- All right, don't get your petals in a twist.
As happy and as perfect
as life in Smurf village is,
even sunshine and butterflies
must have their dark clouds.
And for all Smurfs,
that dark cloud has one name.
Gargamel, the evil wizard.
La la la la la la
Sing a happy song
La la la la la la
This is so wrong
"I'm Papa Smurf.
"I'm the head of a small group of blue people
"and live in the forest
with 99 sons and one daughter.
"Nothing weird about that, no, no.
Totally normal."
"Oh, and I'm Smurfette.
And I think I'm so pretty.
"And I betrayed Gargamel,
and I don't even care.
"And everything is just
sunshine and rainbows."
But all of that is about to change.
I said, "All of that is about to change."
Azrael, that's your cue!
That's your cue to
pounce on the miserable beasts
in some kind of a rage-induced feline frenzy.
Yes, good. Yeah. More rage.
Hey, but don't go crazy.
These are the only puppets I have.
I am not obsessed with Smurfs, thank you.
I simply can't stop thinking about
the miserable beasts
every single minute of every single day.
'Cause I need them!
It is only by capturing the little wretches
and extracting their happy blue essence
that my magic will finally become...
Not infallible.
Invincible! Yes. Thank you.
I shall become the most powerful wizard
in all of the world.
Yeah, but you're milking it. Don't milk it.
"O great one?"
Yes, lying, deceptive,
horrible little Smurfette?
"After all your years of Smurf-less searching,
how ever do you expect to find us?"
I'm very glad you asked, my dear.
For, you see, I have a magical map
that shows me exactly where
the smurf root grows!
I shall now use my formidable powers
to magically transport us here!
Come, my little fish-breathed friend!
Alakazoop!
Great.
Ye gods, Azrael. You're a boy?
We really need that Smurf essence.
Alakazamp!
Now tie it off right there!
That blue moon time of year again.
Time to smurf some magic.
Summon a vision
and see what our future holds.
I must get the visioning potion just right.
The magic is always strongest
during the blue moon.
So far, so good.
Lots of smiles and smurf berries.
Clumsy's sitting still. That's always good.
A dragon wand.
I got it! I got it!
Clumsy.
- Help! Save us!
- Papa!
Papa!
Clumsy, what have you done?
- Hey, Papa.
- Clumsy?
Are you okay?
Yes. Fine.
Why aren't you rehearsing for
the Blue Moon celebration?
You know.
A couple guys got smacked in the face,
so I thought I'd make
some smurf root mud packs
to take down everyone's swelling.
Papa, you're smurf out of smurf root.
I'll go pick some.
No! Those fields are too close
to Gargamel's castle.
I'll get the smurf root.
You stay in the village and out of trouble.
Do you understand?
Okay. If you say so.
A vision's never been wrong.
I can't let this happen to my Smurfs.
"Just stay in the village, Clumsy."
Look at all this smurf root.
They are gonna be so proud of me.
Let's see, just a few more...
- Boo.
- Gargamel!
Help!
Good kitty. Good kitty. Look! Look!
A ball of yarn!
A nice, juicy bird!
So, that's it!
It's invisible.
Those sneaky... Wait, wait, wait, wait.
We don't know if it's safe.
Azrael?
Are you dead?
So, what did you see in your vision, Papa?
Nothing apocalyptic, really.
Everything's going to be just fine.
Perfect. Another year we don't have to
worry about that mean, old...
- Gargamel!
- I know who she meant, Clumsy.
No, no! Gargamel!
I Gargamel!, kinda, sorta
accidentally led him to the village.
Gargamel!
Smurf for your lives!
Everybody skedaddle!
- Into the forest, Smurfs!
- Come on, Clumsy!
Sound the alarm, Crazy.
This is really bad!
Smurfs, that way!
Hey, cat! Azrael, over here! Come on!
There you go, you nasty cat.
- This way!
- This is no joke!
- Look out!
- Papa!
Let go! Cursed nature!
Here comes papa, Papa!
Papa, your primitive little defenses,
they're useless against me, sir!
I laugh at them.
How's that for primitive, Gargamel?
Maybe this will all blow over.
I can fix this. I just gotta think.
Yes!
Follow me, everyone!
Save yourselves!
Clumsy! You're going the wrong way!
- He's headed for the Forbidden Falls!
- With the blue moon coming?
- Quickly, Smurfs! Stop him!
- Unbelievable!
The one time we want him to trip
and he's running perfectly!
- Clumsy!
- Oh, this is a predicament.
"Agony ahead"!
Anybody reading these signs?
- This is a predicament!
- This guy's killing me!
Looks like we're down to 99 Smurfs!
This is not good at all.
Clumsy!
Help!
Well, we tried. Let's go.
Hold on, lad!
We'll form a Smurf bridge to get you.
Not the Smurf bridge!
- There we go.
- Yeah, pardon me.
This is not a Smurf bridge,
it's clearly a chain...
- Smurf it, Brainy!
- Smurf it, Brainy!
- The blue moon!
- Oh, dear.
- What's happening, Papa?
- What the blinking flip is that?
Oh, no!
- The vision!
- Come on, guys!
- Pull him up!
- Hurry!
- Don't let go!
- Help!
Help!
Look out for the hole!
No, it's more of a vortex. Of a portal.
Smurf up! It's a hole.
Hold on!
Oh, no!
Looks like you got
the short end of the stick, eh, Papa?
Now you belong to me!
Not this time, Gargamel!
What's wrong with you?
That was great! Let's have another go.
Are you smurf ed? We almost died in there!
We're not even wet.
What part of the enchanted forest is this?
My calculations indicate...
That's slimy.
I don't think we're in Smurf village any more.
Oh, my.
- Smurfs? You may Want to take a look at this.
- What is it?
Why are we listening to him?
He just got us sucked through a giant hole.
It's not a hole, it's a vortex.
And can't we just go around the rock?
Oh, my smurf.
Where the smurf are we?
Up the smurfing creek without a paddle,
that's where.
Well, at least they're not coming after us.
Oh, yeah. Really?
- Oh, dear.
- Azrael!
- Run!
- Not again!
Azrael? Are you dead?
Must have Smurfs!
- We'll circle back when it's safe!
- Run!
- Guys, come on!
- Go!
- Coming through!
- I'm getting hungry!
Hey, how are you? Yeah, nice to see you.
Enjoy the party.
Hey, can we get
the photographer over there?
There's big arrivals happening.
Thanks. Welcome.
Hey, ladies, looking good.
A couple quick, quick tips.
If you could not stand
directly in front of the display,
but over to the sides,
it'd be a bit more visible. Hey, look, product.
Also, don't forget to smile.
Remember, you're working for
a cosmetics company. That's it.
- Smile, relax, everyone will have a good time.
- Let's go!
- Thanks. Thank you so much.
- Hurry!
Hello, Henri.
On top of everything
with the campaign, Patrick?
Well, as much as I can be.
We certainly did our homework.
We tested the results.
Patrick!
- She's pointing at me.
- That can't be good.
Odile, it looks fantastic for
Thursday's launch.
It's gonna be quite the gala.
There he is.
My new vice president of marketing.
- So, wait, you fired Ralph?
- His campaign was rubbish.
He gave me what I asked for, not what I want.
Can you give me what I want?
Is that what you're asking for?
How would I know what I'm asking for
when I don't even know what I want?
Well said, Odile. Well said.
That's why you need me.
Exacto! I need you to create
a new campaign for Jouvenel.
All digital, of course,
so it can be ready on time for the launch.
Odile, that's two days.
S mi corazn, and it mustn't be delayed.
Is that going to be a problem?
No. No, I mean for a whole new campaign,
it's kind of tight.
But... No, two days is perfect.
God only needed six days
for the whole world, right?
Fail me, and maybe you can
go and work for him.
Where are we, Azrael?
What manner of freakish realm is this?
Okay, one more box of research.
Hey, would you get a cab for me, please?
Yes, yes, of course.
This day just keeps getting better and better.
So we're just gonna jump in the portal,
get back to our village
and everybody's happy, right?
Yeah, guys. Let's stay smurftimistic.
You know what?
I choose to be pessismurfstic.
We're all gonna die.
Papa Smurf, how do we get home
with the portal closed?
I'm sure when the blue moon rises tonight,
the portal will open again.
Now, let's take shelter till dark.
All right, let's get smurfing.
Okay, but I'm not happy.
- Azrael!
- Run, Smurfs!
- Take that!
- Guys, come on!
- Quick, to the tree!
- Let's go!
- Smurfette!
- My hair! Get back, cat!
Way to go, Smurfette!
- Oh, no!
- Take one for the team, Clumsy!
- Help!
- Clumsy, look out!
Smurf!
- Clumsy!
- Oh, no!
Hey.
- Clumsy!
- What a numptie.
- Quickly, to the mechanical wagon.
- Up the tree, Smurfs.
Why don't we just go around the tree?
There you are. By all means,
relax here in the fresh air and the sunshine
while my missing Smurfs could be anywhere.
What? Where?
Come on! Try and stay with me, Smurfs.
- I'm getting too old for this.
- Slow down!
Be careful, Brainy.
Hey. Hey!
Seventh Street, from First and A, please.
- Come on, Smurfs!
- I don't like these heights.
- Don't look down.
- Come back here, wretched Smurfs!
- Hurry!
- We're way up here!
A jump from this height
will Knock the blue out of us!
- My hip.
- Papa!
- Gargamel!
- Oh, dear.
- Stop that carriage!
- Let's go! Let's go!
- Wait, wait. I forgot my phone.
- Come back! Stop there!
Stop that carriage!
Never mind. Here it is.
Knock yourself out, Gargamel!
You've had that coming for about 30 years!
Smurfs!
Oh, wow.
Castles and palaces everywhere!
- And green goblins!
- And red trolls.
And look at the giant princess!
This village is amazing, Papa.
Yes, and likely very dangerous.
Until we rescue Clumsy and get back home,
I need you all to stay close
and do exactly as I say.
- Smurf's honor.
- If you say so.
You can count on us, Papa.
They can see us! Camouflage.
Blend in.
Well, I guess this is our stop. Let's go.
We get to climb another tree.
Watch out, watch out.
Hang on, everybody. Hang on!
- Brainy.
- That's it.
- Thanks a lot. Have a good night.
- I hope Clumsy can breathe in that box.
How are we supposed to
find Clumsy in there?
- I could attempt to smurf the probability...
- Brainy!
- We'll look through every window.
- I don't do windows.
- Now, let's get smurfing.
- You heard him. Come on.
- Every window?
- Piece of cake.
- Grace?
- Hello?
Guess what? Guess what, guess what?
Okay. They invented a zero-calorie pizza.
- No, but that's a good idea.
- Yes. They found...
Baby kicked.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Please say hello.
- Please.
- Hello, little Sea-Monkey.
This is the sound of my voice.
Hello, son or daughter. Hello.
Hello.
That is not the sound of your voice.
That is the voice of a robot.
Our child is gonna be attached to the toaster.
Or the new VP of marketing.
No. No! Oh, my goodness! Oh, my gosh!
- It's...
- It's provisional.
If I wow Cruella de Odile,
then I'll keep the job.
If not, then my head'll be on a pike
next to the last guy.
Well, wow you will! You wowed me.
But I have two days.
- Yikes.
- I know.
What if I don't get them done in time?
Oh, HO, you can't come to the ultrasound.
Unless...
Wait, the backup ads we have
did fine in focus groups.
I could retool those.
I'd have to work around the clock.
Azrael, we've come so far,
yet ever am I haunted by
the same familiar riddle.
How to find the Smurfs?
If only I...
I'm sorry, is my thinking
interrupting your vile hacking?
If only I had something of theirs.
A drop of spittle. A fingernail.
Some hair, even.
Then I could make some Smurf magic.
Very nice. Are you done now?
I don't want to look at it.
What? What?
Is that... No. No, it can't be.
It is.
The tawny locks of Smurfette.
Sweet follicular ambrosia!
Silky strands of joy.
Mixed with a fair amount of cat vomit.
Yes. Yes, I am a genius!
With my skills, even this small trifle
of smurfiness
will yield me just enough power
to catch them all!
I must find a laboratory with which to tease
the magic from these precious little strands.
Yes. It's a bit small,
but this should do nicely!
It's even got its own cauldron.
What died in here?
Open. Open. Open. Open. Open!
Somebody's been working a dark
and terrible magic in there.
What is that?
On, baby.
Daddy is home.
Come on.
Papa, I'm familiar with 613 shades of blue,
- and that moon is not one of them.
- Papa?
Stay calm, everyone.
If the portal opened once, it can open again.
How are we gonna open a magical portal
when we can't even find Clumsy?
Hey, I think I see something up there.
Oh, no.
Clumsy? Is that you?
Hello.
Help! Help!
Oh, smurf.
Hey.
"Berry Boom."
Patrick!
Elway. Elway.
I'm sure this is the box.
When I get my hands on him...
- Someone's coming!
- Smurfs!
What is it?
No, no!
No, no, no, no. Come on, come on, come on.
Please, please.
Elway.
Elway. Did you do that?
- Come on, put a little smurf into it.
- Hang on, Clumsy.
- I got this side.
- All together now.
- Crikey.
- Oh, dear.
- Now what, lads?
- What happened to Clumsy?
- I bet they ate him. Let's go home.
- Hide.
GO! Pull the lid!
Gross.
This is so...
- That's Clumsy!
- Charge, Smurfs! Charge!
- Out of the way, big guy.
- Clumsy, we're coming!
Excuse me. Pardon me.
- This is for Clumsy!
- Wait for me!
- Oh, God!
- Please don't hurt me!
- Please, I just want to go home!
- Are you...
Did you just talk?
I'm not saying till you put down
the giant spiky thing.
- Clumsy!
- Clumsy, where are you?
- Make yourself known!
- Smurf us a sign!
- Come out, Clumsy!
- Smurf out, smurf out, wherever you are.
- Are you there?
- Come to my voice, laddie!
- Where are you?
- Can you hear us?
- Get out of here!
- Look out!
- Too much aggression!
- Go back to the sewers!
Kiss my smurf!
You all find clumsy! The giant is mine!
- Over here!
- Get him!
Have you had enough? Tap out?
Okay, so you're like... You're blue, and...
- Oh, gosh, are you okay?
- Quickly!
- This way! This way!
- Follow me, Smurfs!
- Clumsy! Where are you?
- Look out!
Other way! Other way!
- Run, Smurfs!
- Come on!
Run!
Elway!
- Smurf for your lives!
- Clumsy, where the smurf are you?
- Stinky breath.
- Spread out!
Grace! Run!
Stop bleating like a sheep
and let me hog-tie you, you wriggly numptie.
Grace, we're being attacked!
Do not be fooled by their cuteness!
It's okay, it's okay.
They're friendly.
You're lucky your lassie stepped in.
I was about to make haggis
with your innards.
This is it. This is it, Azrael!
Smurfette's hair goes in here,
flows through the Smurf essence extractor,
and finally, I have my Smurfilator!
It's the pice de rsistance. The crme de la...
Would you care for a mint when you're done?
Yes, yes, yes!
With this precious elixir,
my sorcerous spell shall be powerful
beyond all measurable measurement.
This one tiny drop will give me
the power to capture them all.
This is great!
La la la la la la
Smurf the whole day long
Next time you're feeling blue
Just let a smile begin
Happy things will come to you
So Smurf yourself a grin
It's so obvious
that what you're doing is wrong.
Oh, really? After you.
How crazy is this?
There are little blue people
singing in our kitchen!
So you're sticking with your
"this is actually happening" theory?
Sorry.
Okay. It says here Smurfs are
mythical creatures from Belgium,
- also known as Schtroumpfs...
- Yeah.
Documented by Peyo.
Also says that they bring good luck.
Like leprechauns to the Irish.
It says they're mythical, Grace.
- I'm so sorry, Master Winslow.
- That was great.
Well, they look pretty real to me.
Come on.
- Excuse me.
- Okay, to review.
You guys come from a magic forest
where you live in oversized mushrooms.
- Yes.
- You're being chased by an evil wizard.
- Yeah.
- And you're trapped in New York
- until there's a blue moon...
- Very good.
And you like to use the
extremely imprecise term "smurf"
- for just about everything.
- Smurfxactly.
And you're all
named after your personalities?
Do you get your names when you're born,
or after you've exhibited certain traits?
- Yeah.
- Yep.
Yeah, whatever.
Master Winslow, there must be
something about the blue moon
on your magic window machine.
Just what is this magic searching device?
Right now, I'm using Google.
- Google.
- Google.
Okay. "Blue moon.
A full moon that occurs twice in one month.
"A figurative construct..."
- Much like yourselves.
- Hey!
"But the moon itself
doesn't appear to be blue."
- What?
- Not blue?
- Perfect!
- Now we'll never get home!
No cause for alarm, my little Smurfs.
If we're to open the portal home,
I'll just have to smurf us a potion
to invoke the blue moon.
You hear that, honey?
They're only staying till
an actual blue moon rises.
Which could happen if the little blue
Santa man makes a magic potion,
which, at this point,
seems completely plausible.
- Want a bite?
- No, thank you.
Of course, the stars will
need to be perfectly aligned.
And when that might be is hard to determine
without the proper instrument.
Master Winslow,
might I borrow your stargazer?
My what-whatzer?
He doesn't have a Stargazer. Do you?
- This is all my fault.
- We're all gonna die.
- We're all gonna die!
- Smurf out of it, scaredy-brains!
- One Panicky Smurf is enough!
- Hey!
Besides, Papa had a vision,
and everything turns out smurf y.
Right, Papa?
Yes, yes. It all turns out just fine.
We must find this Smurf thief.
Stop your complaining.
If I were a Smurf, where would I go?
You there, you there. Fancy pants.
Have you seen any little blue men?
- Absolutely. What price are we talking about?
- You're selling them?
- Have you looked in the drawer, sweetie?
- Wait, what drawer?
- In the kitchen, Lilly.
- Who is this Lilly?
Are you kidding?
She's the hottest girl in my department.
Please, please. Please, young woodsman.
What does the temperature of this Lilly
have to do with the finding of Smurfs?
- Take your meds, man.
- What?
Is everyone in this realm completely insane?
Thank the gods, a local wizard. Excellent.
Pardon me, wise sir?
By any chance, have you seen
any little blue men?
They're everywhere!
I knew it. I knew it!
I told you we were close, Azrael.
I know.
Now, just take one, everybody.
We have to make sure our smurf berries last.
Great. We're gonna be here how long?
Not long. First, we have to get a Stargazer.
Next, find a book of spells
and then smurf a portal
and we're home.
Very simple, my little Smurfs.
Bye, Elway.
Someone looks smurfalish!
- Why you wearing a leash?
- It's a tie.
- Does it keep your neck warm?
- No.
Clearly, it functions as an aid in his craft,
like a blacksmith's apron.
I wear it because it's what
everyone wears at work.
What are you, you pasty giant?
I try to get people to buy things
by analyzing market trend predictions.
Predictions! He's a fortune teller.
Look, I would love to explain
but I am super late. I gotta go.
- I really don't have time for this.
- What?
You had one outfit on,
and now you're wearing something
completely different.
- Yeah. It...
- Now, Smurfette,
she probably got the other one dirty.
- Let's not embarrass her.
- Sorry.
Thanks for letting us stay in your mushroom,
Miss Grace.
- It's really nice.
- Well, thank you. I'm glad you like it.
I like our little mushroom, too. But you know,
somebody wants a bigger mushroom.
But, then you'd be further apart.
You said it, sister. Okay, I've gotta go.
I've got an appointment.
I've got a baby on the way, so...
Wait, wait. We can't just
leave them here alone, without an adult.
I'm 546 years old.
Of course you are.
- They'll be fine. They'll be fine.
- All right.
- Love you.
- Okay.
- Bye. Bye.
- Bye, Grace! Goodbye.
By the way, I wouldn't go anywhere
if I were you.
Why not?
Our world doesn't do well
with visitors from other places.
I mean, look what happened to E.T.
It's a movie. A moving picture.
Book. Just stay, okay?
Great. He's gone
and we still don't have a Stargazer.
Wait a smurf. If he's a fortune teller,
he reads stars all the time.
Ergo, it's at his place of business.
Excellent work, Brainy.
What are we waiting for? Let's ride.
- Yeah, come on, guys.
- Hey, stop it.
- Come on, Smurfs!
- Let's go get that Stargazer.
- Surprise, surprise.
- Oh, no.
Clumsy, I think it might be best
if you stay here. You know?
Smurf an eye on the mushroom.
Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
- This way, Smurfs!
- Let's follow Mr. Winslow.
Well, I can smurf an eye on the mushroom.
Smurf away!
- Let's smurf this joint.
- Is he down there?
- Taxi!
- Can you see him?
Look, he's getting into
the mechanical wagon.
- Oh, no.
- Clearly that distance is too great...
- Off you go!
- No! Gutsy!
Come on, Smurfs! Smurfabunga!
Goodbye, blue world.
Use your hat, you ninny!
Couldn't we just have taken the stairs?
- There we go.
- Not funny, Gutsy.
- It was a little funny.
- Smurfs.
We're stopping. Hold on tight.
Not to me, Grouchy.
Oh, did I do that? Sorry.
- Keep the change.
- Thanks, man.
Master Winslow, we really need your help.
- Hey.
- Right here.
What are you doing here?
What part of "we need a Stargazer"
don't you understand, you numptie?
- You can't be out in public.
- Who are you talking to?
If we could just have a quick look around
in your predicting parlor...
- We really wanna go home.
- Come on, man, I gotta go.
- Fine. Just come here, come here.
- Please, please.
All of you. Trust me.
Careful. Hey, watch the smurf berries.
I'm not going... Hey!
- Be quiet.
- It's dark in here.
All right, who smurfed?
Hey! Get your hand out of my kilt.
- That's not my hand.
- Hey, ticklish.
- Morning. Morning.
- Good morning, Mr. Winslow.
- Congratulations on your promotion.
- Thank you.
I hope you guys like desk drawers,
because that's where...
- You're late.
- Odile!
You were in my office.
It's my building,
and we have much work to do.
The launch for Jouvenel is tomorrow night.
Is your concept ready?
Close. I had a crazy morning.
What are you doing?
Nothing. I'm excited.
I'm excited about all the concept ideas.
And hungry. Sorry. Hungry for its success.
Nervous energy.
Nervous energy's what's going on up in here.
- I like it.
- Yep.
- The fear of failure is a fabulous motivator.
- True that.
Hey! Stop it.
- Henri.
- Make it work.
You have no idea.
- What is this?
- Why did I get the armpit?
- Stop pushing me.
- Go easy on the cologne tomorrow.
Are you crazy?
- You're gonna get me fired.
- My hair!
I couldn't even breathe in there.
It smelled like the business end of a sheep.
- I don't see a Stargazer.
- How you doing?
I'm sorry, Master Winslow,
but we badly need to borrow your Stargazer.
I don't have a Stargazer, okay?
It's not something people of this century
just have, especially here.
- Not happy.
- Now if you'll excuse me, I have to work.
Well, perhaps we could sing
to help things along.
And then we'll get the stargazer.
Come along, Smurfs.
La la la la la la
Sing a happy song
La la la la la la
Smurf the whole day long
Stop.
La la la la la la
Stop!
Sing a happy song
Come on. None of you find that song
just the tiniest bit annoying?
I find it annoying.
Well, what do you sing at work?
- I don't sing at work.
- What?
- And you have to wear a leash.
- Harsh.
I know. How about if we hum?
Please stop humming.
I need to hone my message here.
I've got a message.
"Always chew with your mouth closed."
Papa taught us that.
That's good. You should use that.
Or, "Dance and be happy."
How about, "Grab life by the grapes"?
- "Turn that frown upside down."
- "Always bet on blue."
- "Have a smurf y day."
- "I kissed a Smurf and I liked it"?
It's an embarrassment of riches.
They're giving you gold here.
- Thank you.
- Master Winslow,
you'll know it's the right message
if it comes from the heart.
- Right, Smurfs?
- Yeah.
- You said it.
- Absolutely.
- Of course.
- Welcome to my world.
I love emerging dramatically
through the smoke.
It makes... It makes me feel
so deliciously mysterious.
Also, it gives the skin a wonderful glow.
What?
Where? Where?
What?
Curses! So close.
What?
Theirs is upside-down.
Idiots. They painted it wrong. Come, Azrael.
- Hi.
- Hello.
What are you doing?
Just greening things up a bit.
That's so sweet. That's very sweet but,
you know, I'm not so sure
this stuffs gonna grow out here.
We'll see. Smurfs have a very blue thumb.
So where is everybody else?
They went to get a Stargazer
so Papa can smurf a blue moon
to get us home.
And they went without you?
Yeah. I mean, who knows why?
- Hey!
- Sorry!
Why don't we come inside?
- Smurfs, where are you?
- Make sure to demonstrate that
this new anti-aging cream can make
any woman look beautiful, young, vibrant.
It's almost magical.
Astonishing, really.
I see no transformation.
- Your potion has no power.
- Excuse me?
Well, she's still an eye-offending dogfish,
if you ask me.
- Sir!
- This is my mother who you're speaking of.
I'm so sorry. I didn't realize.
How sad for you in 30 years.
Henri, escort this lunatic out.
- "Lunatic"?
- Security!
I am the great and powerful Gargamel!
"Lunatic." Could a lunatic do this?
Alakazootiful!
How did you do that?
Yes, and seriously, me next.
So sorry, but lunatics and great wizards
never reveal their secrets.
Come, Azrael! Now, where are my Smurfs?
No, no, no, no, no. Don't go.
- I need to know what you just did.
- Not telling.
Please, seor Can you do that again?
You may attempt to persuade me.
What is it that you desire?
Riches?
Fame?
Fortune?
With my help,
the whole world
will know the name that is Garbagesmell.
Gargamel.
Yes. With my help, the whole world
will know the genius that is Gargamel.
L.m
I'm sorry. Did you just say "genius"?
So, even though
I'm what you might call accident-prone,
on the bright side, I did
land us all here in your little mushroom,
and we got to meet you and Patrick.
You're so sweet. And I know how you feel.
I'm so clumsy, too.
Well, I used to be.
- Really?
- Yeah.
So how long did it take you to...
Gosh.
Un-fumble your feet?
Well, about as long as it takes to realize
that nobody's just one thing.
You can be anything you wanna be.
- "Hero Smurf."
- Yeah.
Probably not.
- Hey, Brainy, help me figure this out.
- Let me show you.
First, you put your...
Works every time.
La la la la la la
Sing a happy song
This is a fascinating wind machine
you have here.
- Hi, Patrick.
- Grace, help. Help!
They are everywhere
and they won't stop singing.
I cannot get a thing done.
Please come and get these guys.
Seor Gargamel, I'll be frank.
Clinique, Lancme, MAC. They will kill
to get what you have in that ring.
Not if we Kill them first.
Let's see, we're going to need some knights,
preferably in shining armor,
some bowmen, poison arrows.
I like the way you think.
And some spikes to mount their heads on.
Well, it is all about the presentation.
And, of course, all of our testing
would be animal cruelty-free?
What, they pay extra for the animal cruelty?
Is that it?
Get out of here.
You have a wicked sense of humor.
- We like that, don't we?
- Hey, out of here!
Henri?
I said, get out of here.
Seor Gargamel,
now you must assure me, darling,
that you can recreate whatever it was
that you did to my mother,
but on a massive scale.
Do that, and the world will worship you.
- Did you hear that, Azrael?
- Yeah.
"Worship." Oh, it rolls off the tongue
like flesh from a... Not pilgrim...
Heretic. Yes, thank you.
Thank the gods, a chamber pot.
This swill that you call Dom Prignon
has gone straight to my nether regions.
Here, toss this out the window, yeah?
Today, please.
Now, to the matter at hand.
So do we have a deal, seor?
Not quite, my sweet maiden.
You see, first I must have my Smurfs.
You guys just have to understand that
Patrick's under a lot of pressure right now.
So if you could just lay low for a little bit...
You have my word of honor, Miss Grace.
My Smurfs will not move from this bag.
- Okay, good.
- Stargazer!
- What?
- Stargazer! Let's go!
- Everybody out! Come on!
- No, no, no!
- Guys, let's go!
- No, no, no, no, no!
- Full Smurf ahead.
- No, wait, wait!
Hit the deck!
Hey, I'm walking here! I'm walking!
- Save me!
- Hey, look out, Brainy.
Can't everyone just slow down
- and enjoy life?
- Get off me. Get off!
Wait for it.
I gotta get me one of those.
Oh, my gosh!
- Hey, lady! Hey!
- Wait, wait. Hold on!
When we get inside, spread out
and find that Stargazer.
Come on, Smurfs!
- Hey.
- Patrick, the Smurfs have gone AWOL.
Grace, are you running?
No, no, I'm totally fine,
but they need your help!
Patrick, I'm afraid they're gonna
get themselves killed!
Sweetie, they're fine.
They can send us a tiny thank-you note
when they get back to shroom town.
Right after they invent paper.
Patrick, they need you.
- Honey...
- Patrick, I need you.
Oh, my gosh, please hurry!
All right. Where are you?
The man is a lunatic. It's not going to work.
I don't know, he needs Smoops.
- "Smurfs."
- Smarps.
No, no, "Smurfs." "Smurfs" with an...
Sorry. I'm so sorry.
You call that groveling, you fool?
Every village has an idiot. What?
You're right. That's him!
Stop! Stop! Smurf thief!
Smurf thief!
Come on, guys, the dolls are here!
Stargazer, Stargazer, Stargazer.
Stargazer, Stargazer, Stargazer, Stargazer...
So that's where all the unicorns went.
I'm not afraid to go off on my own,
I thought you might like the company.
Fine. Then hang on.
A Smurf cannon! The only way to fly.
Perfect.
Time to catch some air! Smurfabunga!
That'll put some air up your skirt!
Gotta be a Stargazer up here somewhere.
Predator!
Smurf droppings.
These are disgustingly tasty.
Hello.
Oh, creepy.
I hope they weren't looking
for a stargazer, too.
Stargazers, stargazers...
Dresses!
You mean I can have
more than one kind of dress?
What?
Papa, I'm telling you,
we're never gonna find those...
- Stargazers.
- They're dangerously high.
You're right.
We're gonna need something tall.
- Don't you think someone will notice us?
- Just act natural.
- I'm a bear.
- Brainy!
I'm coming. I'm coming, I'm coming, guys.
Hold still, stairs!
Look at the stair-climbing toy!
- Hey.
- What is that?
- Let me see it.
- Careful.
- I want one, too, Mommy!
- Let me see.
I'm just tired of the whole dating game.
Just say who you are
and be who you say, right?
I can't seem to get it to scan.
My son wants one of those
blue animatronic things.
Can you help me out here?
Do they come in pink?
- My daughter wants pink.
- I'm sorry.
What aisle did you find this on?
- I'll take the floor model.
- I was here first.
- There's a line.
- Can I interest you in a Coldy Holdy Ice Bat?
What? Ice Bat?
It comes in pink.
Smurf thief! Stop!
Do I use my grouchiness as a wall
because I'm afraid to be vulnerable?
You bet.
Smurf!
But I've got feelings.
No. No, I can't be out already!
What was I thinking?
Wasting my only drop of Smurf essence
on that old hag?
It's a big problem, sir.
We don't seem to have it in stock.
Hey! Keep your smurfs to yourselves!
- Don't you people have any boundaries?
- Grab it!
I'm not a toy!
- Where is she?
- Where'd she go?
- There she is!
- There she is!
Hey, this dress is mine!
- Smurfette!
- Wait, I'm shopping.
- Let's shop later.
- Go! Come on!
- Patrick! Patrick, help!
- Clumsy, come here!
A giant's after me! She's huge!
Hey, that's mine!
Sorry, little girl, this one's not for...
- Mommy!
- Really?
Don't ever forget that one magical moment
our two worlds met.
And I wasn't grouchy, I wasn't.
Can you just say one thing, please?
I'm dying here.
Hey!
That's one!
Technically, when loading cargo
onto the head of a bear,
- one should distribute the weight...
- Brainy, just pull.
Ahoy, mateys! What are ya waiting for?
We're drawin' a crowd.
- Show-off.
- Oh, dear. They think we're toys.
Hold onto your knickers, boys,
it's about to get grisly.
- Don't let me fall!
- Just hang onto that stargazer, you two!
- Hey! Come on, Smurfs!
- They're getting away!
Let's go, go, go!
I'll have you at ramming speed in no time.
- Hold on!
- I think we lost them.
- Again with the head.
- Oh, dear.
- Out of the way or I'll caber toss ya!
- Where did you learn how to drive?
- You think you can do better?
- Yes, I do believe I can do better.
Two more!
- Brainy! Gutsy!
- Papa!
Grace, that's Gargamel!
- Oh, you again! Get your paws off me!
- No, no, no, no.
Bad kitty!
Oh, I hate that Cat!
Gargamel.
Smurfette.
More lovely than ever.
Oh, Gargamel,
I guess you've outsmarted us again.
Or not!
Azrael. Azrael, what are you doing?
Get out of my suckamajig!
- Get out!
- Let me help you with that.
Oh, thank you, kind... You! You...
Yahoo!
- Patrick.
- Hey.
- Impressive.
- Thanks.
- I'll get the Stargazer.
- I'll get the Smurfs.
That's him! He took it right off my back!
Leaf-blower thief!
Please stand up, sir.
You're going downtown.
- Do not resist. Do not resist!
- Unhand me. Unhand me, you heathens!
Or suffer the wrath
of the great and powerful...
Let me... Let me see here...
How can you be the only girl in the village?
Well, see, I wasn't brought
by a stork like the others.
I was created by Gargamel
to trap the other Smurfs.
Wow. And then what happened?
Papa saved me.
He cast a special spell and then helped me
become the Smurf I was meant to be.
No. Play it safe.
"Odile, pending your approval,
it's ready to go to the billboard agency."
Well, here goes nothing.
- Papa should be done by now.
- Yeah. Enough with the suspense.
- I wanna go home.
- Me, too.
Now that that wily wizard's got our scent,
it's a whole new wager.
Without that blue moon,
our giblets are gravy.
Well, it's off.
Time to either celebrate
or file for unemployment.
Hey, what's wrong?
- I'm sure we'll be fine.
- Oh. It's okay.
- That one's hypersmurfilating.
- Yeah, tell me about it.
- It's all this waitin' that's killin' us.
- Yeah.
I know the feeling.
Better yet...
I know the cure.
You just match the colors with the buttons.
You try.
Hey! Go, Grouchy!
- You're good!
- Nice one!
Hey, look at me, guys! I'm shredding!
Walk this way...
You sing.
Talk this way
Just give me a kiss
It's a rock face.
- It's Gene Simmons. He's a...
- Huh?
Never mind.
- Like this
- Like this
Smurfette sweetie is a classy kind of sassy
Little skirts climbing way up her knee
Not another single girl
in the whole smurf in' world
And I can't believe
she's lookin' at me
- it's a complete
- Surrender
- To the power of her
- Gender
So I close my eyes and make a wish
- I just want to
- Savor
- All her smurf berry
- Flavor
So I smurf ed her just a little kiss
Like this
- Check out Clumsy.
- Whoa, Clumsy.
- You found your niche.
- Yeah!
Clumsy, holdin' it down. Look at him go!
- Come on, Gutsy!
- Here we go!
Yay, Gutsy! Get down with your bad smurf!
- Go, Gutsy!
- That's right.
- Careful.
- Get your smurf on!
- Gutsy!
- Nice!
- Yeah!
- Thank you.
That was rare.
Hey, guys. How do you like my new dress?
Whoa! Is there a draught in here?
Oh, okay, that's not what I had in mind.
Are you thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?
Sorry, boys.
Yeah, that cools the giblets.
Nothin' like a cool breeze
through my Enchanted Forest.
- It's approved.
- What?
- She approved it. She approved the ad!
- She loved it?
Well, she said "approved,"
so coming from her, that's love.
Oh, my goodness!
- Patrick, yeah!
- You owned it!
Oh, my goodness! Yay, Patrick!
Yeah.
No jumping, no jumping, no jumping.
No jumping, no jumping. Okay.
- Should I send it? I'm not going to.
- Yes! Do it!
- Do it this minute.
- I will do it. All right.
Do it, do it.
Go, go, go!
Tomorrow this'll be on every billboard
in New York City.
It's a go, laddie boy!
- Well done, Master Winslow.
- Oh! Hey, guys, Papa's back.
- Papa, are your calculations done?
- Yeah!
I'm nearly out of smurf berries.
It's proving more difficult than I'd hoped.
But we are going home, right?
Of course. Just not tonight.
Now, off to bed.
I was hoping I'd be sleeping
in my mushroom tonight.
I miss the other Smurfs.
Me, too.
I've never spent the night away
from home before.
Well, there was last night.
But who could sleep?
Hush. Hush now, Smurfs.
Everything's going to be just fine.
Papa?
Do you really believe we're ever gonna
get home to the other Smurfs?
Don't worry.
We'll be reunited with the others
soon enough.
If only the stars would align.
You know who I miss?
Chef Smurf. Hefty Smurf.
- Hey, Jokey Smurf.
- G reedy. Narrator.
- Painter. Baker.
- Harmony.
Oh, I miss Complimentary Smurf.
He always has such nice things to say.
I'll tell you who I don't miss,
Passive-Aggressive Smurf.
- Aye.
- Yeah.
He's always so nice,
but when he leaves you feel bad.
Ah, another wretched Smurf less night.
Oh, hello, little moth.
Perhaps with your help
I'll find a way to get them back.
Oh, you and I are kindred spirits, little one.
Both of us meant to soar.
Go now, and bring back an army
of mighty eagles to free me.
Fly, tiny eagle.
Fly and bring back your brethren.
Fly! Fly!
Fly!
Okay. Let's see here.
Hey.
I'm guessing you have
a long night ahead of you.
- You guys drink coffee?
- Is a Smurf's butt blue?
So tell me, that weird guy
in the ratty bathrobe at the toy store?
- Gargamel?
- He's not really a wizard, is he?
Not the smartest of sorcerers,
but dangerous just the same.
Thank you.
Back home, I could hold him at bay
with a spell or two.
But here, without my books and potions...
Well, today we got lucky.
But next time, who knows?
Well, what are you gonna do?
I'll do anything and everything I can do
to get my Smurfs home.
I won't ever give up. They're my family.
And you never give up on family.
Doesn't it freak you out sometimes
having all those little guys
depending on you?
I mean, what if you screw up?
How'd you know when you were ready?
Here. Come sit on Papa's lap.
Yeah, right. Scratch that.
- Probably not the best idea.
- Yeah, yeah.
Let me ask you something.
Why did you come for us today
when your Grace called?
She needed me. I could hear it in her voice.
Well, that's what being a papa is.
When it comes time, you just do.
And knowing what to do
doesn't come from up here.
It comes from here, where it matters most.
My spleen?
No, your heart.
I'm trying to have a moment here,
you whippersnapper.
- You're a good papa, Papa.
- And you'll be a good one, too.
Come on, what you doing, man?
Get that weight off there.
Come on, baby, stop playing.
Come on, you silly moth.
Where are my eagles?
You know what happens to people
who sit on my bench?
Be gone with you, behemoth,
for I have instructed a moth
to summon forth a gaggle of noble eagles
to free me from this confine.
- Get up, Grandpa!
- Hey.
You see? You see?
The dungeon isn't built that can hold
the likes of Gargamel.
Behold my glorious army of... Flies?
- Flies? I Said "to fly." "Fly."
- What is this?
Not "flies," you light-loving moron.
All right, up, up, up, bother it all.
Up! Up, you inglorious devils!
So long, scallywags!
Well, don't do it again.
Go around it, go around!
- Oh, that's nasty.
- Go around it. Stupid flies.
Wait, take me with you!
Wait! Wait!
To my castle for more essence!
Here they come, here they come.
- Pretty smurf y, if I do say so myself.
- Yeah.
Come on, Elway, right over here.
Good boy. Thank you very much.
- Oh, my goodness.
- Here we go.
- There we are.
- Clumsy.
- Blue thumbs.
- This is unbelievable.
I think there's too much pink.
Just because your name is Grouchy
doesn't mean you always have to be grouchy.
Yeah, it does.
- Smurfette.
- Hi.
- High five. High four.
- High four.
Great news! The stars have revealed
a perfect time to smurf the blue moon.
- We're going home! Yay!
- I knew you'd do it, Papa!
- All right!
- Smurftastic!
I never doubted it for a second.
It has to be done tonight,
between first star and high moon.
That's our only chance.
But we'll need a magic spell
that works in this realm
to open the portal home.
- Master Winslow, a question, please.
- Yeah, shoot.
Is there a place that sells spells?
No.
- Is there a place that proffers potions?
- Yeah, no.
How about old books?
Wait, there's an antique book shop
right near where I work.
- Yes. Dr. Wong's. Yeah.
- Dr. Wong's something.
- Perfect. That'll do.
- Oh, hear that, boys? We're almost home.
- Yeah!
- I love being almost home.
Hey! Smurf hug!
Oh, I love you guys!
Bring it in, big fella.
- I wouldn't...
- Come on, we know you want to.
- Yes.
- Yeah, come on, Patrick.
- If I can do it, you can do it.
- Go on, big fella.
- Here he comes!
- Smurf hug!
- We're goin' home!
- Hey there.
Hey, get up here.
- That's it, laddie. Nice one.
- What's that?
Yeah. All of ya. All of ya!
Oh, look!
We don't have to make a blue moon.
We've already got one.
- Really?
- What?
- Look, guys, right over there.
- No, it isn't.
It is. Smurfette's right.
Look at the blue moon.
That's the wrong ad.
What happened to my office?
We fixed it for the baby. Another smurf hug!
No. No, no, no. This isn't happening.
This isn't happening.
Someone sent this
to the ad agency last night.
- Who messed with my computer?
- I dunno.
- None of my Smurfs would...
- Wasn't me.
I Gargamel!, sorta, tripped.
Yeah, well, you Gargamel!, sorta,
just got me fired.
You sent the wrong file.
- Patrick, it was just an accident.
- What am I supposed to do, Grace?
You said that they would bring good luck.
This is anything but good.
I never should've let this happen.
I should've said no.
I never wanted a house
full of little people running around!
Blue. Little blue...
Okay...
Patrick.
What are you doing?
Going to try to save my job.
We never intended to be a burden,
Master Winslow.
I'm smurfilly sorry about what I...
Stop saying "smurf" for everything.
What does that even mean? Smurf!
Smurfitty-smurf-smurf-smurf!
There's no call
for that kind of language, laddie.
See?
Okay, Patrick, wait.
- Hey, hey!
- Will you...
- Wait, Patrick.
- Maybe I can try to fix it.
Just stop and listen to me
for a second, please.
- What?
- Look, I'm really sorry about your job, okay?
And I hope that you can straighten that out.
But you are so not seeing
the big picture here.
I mean, look around.
Look what's happening right now.
Of all the people on the planet,
those magical little creatures came to us.
They chose us.
Don't you see
how absolutely amazing that is?
This is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, Patrick.
This is our blue moon.
And if you don't stop
for just a second to see that,
you're gonna miss it.
Hey, hey. Taxi!
Come on! Come on! Blast. Blast you!
There's got to be some essence
in here somewhere!
NOT DOW.
What? What?
Very, very well done, my little friend.
And to think, I almost ate you that time.
Come, Azrael. We must find this Patrick,
the rouge merchant.
He will lead us to our
elusive little blue quarry.
Don't you just have a switch or something
to shut them off?
Tomorrow? Are you kidding me?
Ron, Ron. If I don't get those ads down now,
I don't have a job tomorrow.
Smurf me.
Which way to the bookstore, Brainy?
According to the searching device,
we take the F machine
two dots past the red circle to Chinaland.
- Look out, Brainy.
- "Chinatown," birdbrain.
- Smurftito, smurftato.
- Here it is.
- Come on, everybody.
- Let's go, let's go.
- Mind the gap.
- Wait? Are we sure about this?
- What?
- Jump!
- Oh, my.
- Not happy.
Come on, Brainy
Let's poke around this great steel carriage.
- Is it safe?
- Of course it is.
That was great.
I hope we find this place soon.
I can't see out of this...
For smurf's sake.
I thought that's why we left Clumsy behind.
Oh, it smells like butter in here.
Where do you suppose
this magic bookstore could be?
- Wait a minute.
- There it is.
- It's closed.
- Figures.
We have to find a way in. Come on.
I'm gettin' too old for this.
- Brainy.
- Gutsy.
All right, everybody.
- Hey.
- Wow.
This place looks creepy to me.
It's not creepy, it's different. And I like it.
Let's just get the book
and get outta here.
You're right. This book of spells
is our ticket home.
I am but a simple wizard with a simple desire,
limitless power and world adulation.
Now why does it have to be so hard?
Pardon me. Please, wise sir.
Wise sir. Please, please.
Wherever did you hear
that ear-damning squall?
It's your little blue men.
I saw them going into the bookstore
around the corner.
You know, that song is really annoying.
Cautiously excited.
That's not it. That's not it.
Hey! Oh, no, that's not it.
Look at all these amazing books.
It's gotta be in here somewhere.
No, this isn't it.
You see anything, Smurfette?
Nothin' up here, guys. Look out below!
- I've got somethin', lads.
- Great job, Gutsy.
Oh. Nearly there.
- Well done.
- Just a minute. That's it. There we go.
Ah, yes.
"L'Histoire des Schtroumpfs. 
Peyo.
- That's us.
- Yes, this is the one.
- Look at that.
- Wow.
Well, I'll be smurf ed.
The secret runes are hidden in the drawing.
You see all that in there?
Look here, at the patterns on this page.
Openous-lockicuss.
What?
You're right, Azrael.
This does have "me" written all over it.
Oh, that's just plain naughty.
All that remains now is to return
to the waterfall and invoke this spell, tonight.
- And we can go home?
- And we can go home.
- Oh, you're going home, all right.
- No.
To a little place I like to call
BellVeedaRay Castle,
where your essence shall finally be mine.
- The dragon wand.
- No!
It's...
Oh, please, please, allow me.
- It's Gargamel!
- Run, Smurfs!
- Come on, Smurfs!
- Go, go, go!
Wait for me!
- To the door!
- Smurfentine! Smurfentine!
- Hurry!
- Yes, yes, do resist, little Smurfs.
After all,
what is the hunt without the thrill!
No!
- We gotta go! Move!
- Run!
- Get goin', Smurfs!
- Faster, faster.
Let's get outta here.
Brainy, take the spell, brew the potion
and smurf the moon tonight.
It has to be tonight.
Me? Smurf the moon?
- No, no, I'm not ready.
- You have to be.
- Go. And no matter what happens...
- Papa?
- ...Do not come back for me.
- What?
- Papa, no!
- No!
- Papa!
- What are you waiting for, Gargamel?
Come to papa, Papa!
- Just go!
- Papa!
- Papa!
- No!
Keep movin', lass.
- Do as Papa said.
- Papa!
Is that all that you've got, Gargamel?
What's gonna happen to Papa?
Papa told us to smurf the moon,
and that's exactly what we're gonna do.
Come on. We don't have much time.
"Come on"? Come on, where?
How are we gonna get back to Clumsy?
We ride. Come on!
- Be still, bird.
- I don't think they're friendly.
- Well, neither am I.
- But they carry disease.
And Smurfs. Let's ride.
- Whoa, bird, whoa!
- Come on!
But I'm not sure I can do this.
You can do it, Brainy. Hold on!
According to my calculations,
this is dangerous!
It's getting dark.
Yeah. Yeah, I think
we'd better go look for them.
Yeah.
Hi.
- Where are the others?
- We think they're still at the bookstore.
Listen, Grace, I'm...
Hey, Odile.
Patrick...
Listen, listen. Before you fire me,
I know that the ads that ran
weren't the ads I sent.
But they're the ads I should have sent.
The ads I almost did send.
But I didn't 'cause...
I second-guessed myself.
I gave you what I thought you wanted,
instead of what I thought was right.
But this is right.
It means something to me and...
I don't know,
I think it's gonna mean
something to others, too.
It's not just a moon, Odile, it's a blue moon.
"Once in a blue moon."
That means that there are
only a few moments in your life
when something truly memorable,
truly magical, happens to you.
And, if you hesitate, if you're afraid,
you might just miss it.
That's what that image means.
Don't let those blue moon moments
pass you by.
I will call you back to tell you if you're fired.
I so smurf in' love you.
Left-left, right! Right-right, bird!
- Brace for impact!
- The window's open, ya ninny.
We're outta control!
Whoa, bird! Watch out for the...
- That'll do, pigeon.
- Thank you, bird.
Look! We got the incantation.
- Where's Papa?
- Gargamel's got him.
- What?
- Oh, no.
He took him to some place
called BellVeedaRay Castle.
- He's gonna...
- Don't say it.
BellVeedaRay. What is BellVeedaRay?
Belve... He's taken him
to Belvedere Castle in Central Park.
To extract his essence.
- What? Well, we have to go get him.
- Yeah.
No! Gargamel's more powerful than ever.
Papa said no matter what happens
we're not to go back for him.
He's trying to protect us.
- No! We can't leave Papa behind.
- It was a Smurf promise.
No, no, no. We can't.
We promised Papa
we'd do exactly what he said.
- That's right.
- I didn't.
I never promised him anything.
Neither did I. And there is no way
I'm leaving here without Papa.
Patrick, wait. I'm coming with you.
I'm in.
Aye. Me, too.
No Smurf left behind! Not Papa, and not you.
- All for one and one for Smurf!
- All for one and one for Smurf!
I 'll squeeze a few
And tweeze a few
And steal their essence blue
Very impressive, my dear, sweet little Papa!
Oh, look at this.
Just a tiny little bit of your little tiny beard
yields me all of this essence.
Just imagine what I'll be able to harvest
from your entire family of Smurfs.
Alakazookas!
Behold my glorious Smurf magic machine!
No. No! The cages! No! No!
I'll steam the essence from their sweat.
I'll tug it from their tears!
I'll snip it from their hair.
You're a fool, Gargamel.
My Smurfs are well on their way home
by now.
Oh, yeah. Let's light this candle.
Good luck, Gutsy!
- Into the breach!
- I'll see you there!
- We all remember the plan, right?
- Let's get our smurf on.
Brainy, what's happening?
I've added the ingredients.
It's more powerful than anticipated.
I don't think I can do it.
Okay, Brainy, you can do this.
Just say the incantation.
I'll be smurf ed!
I did it. I did it, Papa! I did it!
- I don't believe it!
- Wow.
- It's the Anjelou moon.
- How did she do that?
- It's beautiful.
- Oh, Odile.
- Oh, wow.
- That's wonderful.
Now, I don't want you to worry, Papa.
That which doesn't kill you
only makes me stronger.
- Yo!
- Huh?
Gargamel! Come out and play!
Oh, I think our tiny little guests
have finally arrived.
- No!
- Ah, well.
Enjoy the ride, Papa!
And remember, keep your hands and feet
- inside the cart at all times.
- No. No! No!
Smurfs, run!
Smurfs.
You have our Papa. Prepare to get smurfed!
Yeah, what he said.
Adorable.
Two little smurfs come to save
their beloved Papa.
Hey, Gargamel.
Make that three little smurfs.
And I went home and got a few friends.
MY, my, my!
I think the whole village must be here.
Whatever will I do with all this essence?
On me, boys.
Fire!
Let's get this hoedown started!
There comes a time
when every Smurf must stand up...
Watch it, you little hoodlums!
For what is good and cute and blue
in the world.
And on this brisk New York night,
that time is now.
Hey! Seriously?
Sorry, it's kind of what I do.
Eat yolk, Gargamel!
Patrick, can you do it?
Go, go, go!
Hurry, they can't hold out for long.
You know, one bad apple
can ruin your whole day.
Full smurf ahead!
Come on!
Hey, Gargamel,
here's a little souvenir from the Big Apple.
- Out of the frying pan...
- And into the...
- Fire.
- Fire.
I'm too beautiful to die!
Oh, Papa.
No. No, Smurfette.
What did he do to you?
You shouldn't have come back for me.
Papa, I'm getting you out of here right now.
Smurfette!
Hang on, Papa, I'll be back.
Charge!
Get him!
Grab the wand!
- Goin' in!
- Go!
Bombs away!
- I'm going for a strike!
- Alakazam!
- Crikey.
- Look out, Gutsy!
Oh, ya blinkin' flip!
Hang on, Papa.
Onions!
Get back, cat.
Here, kitty, kitty...
Smurfette!
Looking for me?
Play time is over!
Behold the awesome power of me!
Smurfette?
Had enough, huh?
You're mine, kitty.
I'm done smurfing around.
You smurf ed with the wrong girl.
- I got you, Greedy.
- Oh, my cupcake!
What's happening, Papa?
No!
Gargamel!
Not so fast, goody blue-shoes.
Oh, Papa!
Now, it's time to break their little blue wills.
- No.
- Are you watching closely, Smurfs?
- Papa!
- Your beloved little Papa
is about to meet his little blue end.
No!
Upsy-daisy!
Oh, no. Papa!
Papa!
No! No!
You again!
Goodbye!
I'm really...
This ends here, this ends now!
Really going to enjoy this.
Gotcha!
Freedom!
Son of a smurf!
Come back here!
Go, Gutsy! Yeah!
Come back here right now with my wand!
Oh, no. Crikey.
I... I got it.
- Oh, dear.
- Clumsy.
- So this is how it ends.
- Our goose is cooked.
- This is not gonna be good.
- We're doomed.
I got it! I got it!
The vision's never been wrong.
I got it!
My wand! Give me back my wand!
How dare you!
How dare you defy the great and powerful...
Oh, my God.
Smurfs!
Are you dead?
- Nice one, Clumsy!
- Are you kidding me?
- Get up here, you!
- Yeah!
Bravo! Danke schn, Clumsy!
- Patrick.
- Hey.
Clumsy! Clumsy! Clumsy! Clumsy!
Clumsy, you're a hero.
I'm a hero?
Yeah. Yeah.
I'm a hero! I'm so sorry, guys.
Definitely killed the moment.
- Clumsy, you little mook, you.
- It's Papa.
I owe you an apology, Clumsy.
I believed more in a vision than I did in you.
I'm so proud of you, Clumsy.
Thanks, Papa.
I promised myself I wouldn't cry.
And now to get rid of this!
To the portal, everyone!
There's no time to spare.
- Smurf y'all later!
- Bye.
I'm not one for long goodbyes,
but I did smurf together a few words
I'd like to say.
- Bye.
- Take care.
I hated this. So much less than I expected.
- Bye, Grouchy.
- Don't get me wrong, I still hated it. Just less.
I'll not soon forget this place.
Especially not with these! Tallyho!
I shall be back, Broadway. Tootles!
- Hey, girlfriend.
- Wow.
I've never had a girlfriend before.
- I'll never forget you.
- Smurfette.
High four.
High four, Grace.
- Hey, Smurfette.
- And you.
- Hi.
- You, the little hero, come here.
Hero? Stop.
Well, actually, you mind saying
it one more time?
It's kinda got a nice ring to it.
- Bye, Grace.
- Well, Master Winslow, thank you.
- You saved me.
- So long!
You saved my whole family.
Actually I think it was the other way around.
Well, I should get going.
I've got a Smurf village to rebuild.
Your village has given me some ideas.
Come here.
Goodbye, Papa.
Goodbye, Papa.
Let's go home.
And so, the Smurfs left
the strange city of New York,
and I think they left it a little sweeter,
a little wiser,
a little smurfier.
And as that portal began to close
for the last time...
Hey! Seriously, stop!
Bye, New York!
It's Odile. Hey, Odile.
Patrick, I just called to say thank you.
Finally someone has given me what I want.
I think I'm not fired.
Wow!
Wow. So that's a new job, new baby,
some unique new friends...
- You know if you really want a bigger place.
- Bigger?
Are you crazy? Then we'll be further apart.
Oh, Grace...
I smurf you.
Smurfs. Smurfs!
I wish I could quit you. Get out of here.
What are you looking at?

 

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